I come from a large family so when df took a turn for the worse three weeks ago( he has cancer everywhere including his spine) and was admitted to hospital I couldn't visit him as I had started a new job but others did.
DM said his kidneys were failing so I went with dh my next day off.So did his db and wife then my other 2 dsis with their kids and dhs.
Df was sleeping loads and became tearful and overwhelmed and told DM repeatedly he was dying and wanted to.
My db came home from abroad and was upset when he saw how bad df was.He can barely walk and was having toilet accident s as he couldn't make the loo.
Df decided all IVs and meds were to be stopped and no one was to visit.
I usually see him each week and have only seen him once in three.
This is heartbreaking as we can only get brief updates and has caused friction between myself and both dsis who I m usually little contact.
Our Db is allowed to visit and support DM with lifts.....no one else can she gets cabs than call.I understand they need some time alone.
I'm finding it hard that I can't visit and hope it won't be too late as I've always offered help shopping and checking on them for the last few hrs they have both been I'll.
I have no idea why DM is doing all the visits and care and leaving us out of the loop.
My dd was allowed to pop in as she lives hundreds of miles away and came to see her grandad.
When I visited I was cheerful and positive too.