Very stressed

[Emxo1]

hi so basically I'm 27 weeks pregnant.

My EDD is 13th November.

I had a miscarriage in December last year and absolutely fell apart, i also have borderline personality disorder, all I can think is I'm gonna lose my baby!

i now have a new worry and it is constantly on my mind it's tearing me apart..

before me and my current boyfriend got together I ended up sleeping with someone on the 22nd January. I had a heavy period on 4th Feb for about 3/4 days my periods are usually longer. I then took a pregnancy test on 28th Feb which was negative (5weeks after intercourse)

Me and my current boyfriend has sex a few times between 14-22 Feb.

I took a test on 11th march which was positive. I then took a clear blue which said 2-3 weeks pregnant so that suggests conception 16-23 Feb which sounds about right.

I had a scan on 24th march which put me at 6 weeks 2 days which dates back to around the time of my period And a due date of 18th novwmber. My dating scan was at 13 weeks and 3 days on 11th may giving me EDD 13 November, so I would of conceived around 20th Feb and my period from that says 6th. All the dates add up, also had a 16 week 4d scan

So my question is can I bee 100% the baby is my partners? There is a 4 week gap as if it was the other lads counted from periods there is 4 week didference! Just so paranoid but surely all of that couldn't be wrong by so far out?

Stop being paranoid. The baby is your boyfriends. Enjoy your pregnancy!

Hmm :(

Is pointing on here really going to help you?
You already know that after the last time you had unprotected sex with Man A, you had a negative test 5 weeks later. You were not pregnant.
You know that.
No-one here can say anything more compelling than the facts you already have.

You are having obsessive / intrusive thoughts about it - it's not about facts, it's about mental health. Have you told your GP or midwife so that they can help you? (and also about your fears of loss)

Good luck with your pregnancy Do talk to your midwife - it sounds the period around conception was chaotic for you, and you need mental health support now.

Don't worry it's definitely the boyfriend's baby! Just enjoy your pregnancy.

I posted on here as I can't reassure myself and was hoping that other people saying the same I'm thinking would help give reassurance.
Despite taking the test 5 weeks after intercourse I have read that sometimes they can be wrong
But I have had a scan at 6 weeks 9 weeks and 12 weeks so feel surely they'd know if it was 4 weeks out yet still doubt..
I'm really struggling with my mental health and have seen a psychiatrist once despite being referred when 8 weeks pregnant, I seen her 5 weeks ago and now have to wait 6 weeks for another appointment, spoke to midwife about my concerns and all she said was that she can't say 100% but that it's likely however I can't deal with the doubt
I google all day everyday trying to find reassurance but everything says different
I am petrified that something will go wrong with the pregnancy and il lose my baby as I lost my last baby, I can't speak to my partner as I don't want to bring up the past and make him doubt he's the dad
I'm at the worst place I've been in a while with my mental health and feel completely alone

Thank you

Push your GP and midwife for support, though I know it's hard to get.

Did you see a heartbeat at the 6 week scan? If you didn't it doesn't mean that there's any doubt. But if you did a 4 week foetus simply doesn't have a heartbeat yet.

Early scans are very accurate at dating - my IVF consultant took me through some research of accuracy by scan date. By 20 weeks there's a bit of variation as they grow differently, but those early scans are very accurate.

re the loss. I didn't suffer extreme anxiety, but after a 12 week loss (12 week scan, missed mc so development was less) I found it very hard to believe that my next baby wasn't going to just stop too. I think she was about 34 weeks when I started to believe she might stay. It's hard. She's 8 now Hang on it there!

I did see a heartbeat but I was 6 weeks &5 days, I know they can apparently be out by 5 days either way just still worry as the period I had at start of Feb was shorter than my usual and I think I'm just paranoid but the midwife didn't put my mind at ease so that made me worry more
I was 12 weeks when I miscarried and actually held the foetus which traumatised me quite a lot although it was just a little red thing it had arms And did look like a tiny red baby
I think il stop worrying when I give birth haha!
Aww glad you got your happy ending :)

I hope you do too. It never helped me when people said they were sure I would... because you're never 100% sure, are you? But statistically, at 27 weeks, you're risk levels have dropped so much now, and reduce by the day.

Your timing just screams that it is your boyfriend's!

Don't sweat the midwife. She's not going to commit because it's not her place to - and you could tell her something wrong about your dates, so she's going to be sure not to commit to it.

A false negative would be very rare. And all your scan dates tie in.

A lot of people think their periods are always the same length, same flow. Because we don't pay too much attention! I bet you were paying more attention, because you'd had unprotected sex! So you think that Feb was unusual... but truth is, lots of periods vary. I had fertility problems, and used a forum then. Lots of women when they started charting and really paying attention to their periods said that they were a revelation! And not as regular or similar as they thought at all.

Thank you, nope just worry constantly haha! Just hope he's healthy and stays healthy
Even when I think of all the things pointing it to being my boyfriends I still somehow worry then think how can I still doubt when all of this points to the baby being his! I think a DNA would put my mind at rest but I know I couldn't afford it so I guess I need to convince myself!
I suppose yeah I was taking more notice as I was worrying then! Man A was when I was very drunk to the point I couldn't remember my home address so I didn't actually remember having sex until he messaged me abusive messages when I posted about being pregnant making threats to me and my baby so it would just be absolute hell if he was the father I think that's probably why I'm so concerned!
Currently looking at the difference between 6 week and 10 week scans and the difference is quite significant which is helping me calm abit :)
Thanks so much for responding and reassuring