Hi
This may be a third world problem but its eating me up.
Separated from my stbex last April, met new BF in Sept. I have 2 teenage children (16 & 13). I work part-time in a good position with the potential to become a Director in the next few years. I will be increasing my hours this year but there is not enough work just yet for full time. Although its a decent salary its by no means a lot! I still rely on tax credits, child benefit and maintenance from my ex as well as doing Airbnb to afford any extras. (So I guess with all the work Airbnb involves I work full time hours equivalent).
My new BF has always earned much more than me but he has recently taken a leap and is heading into a 6 figure sum. He is money orientated in that he wants to do well, to afford a nice (but not lavish) lifestyle and be able to help his parents. He is very generous.
We are so in love, he really is the love of my life and it feels very mutual.
My issue is I don't know how to deal with the difference in earnings. I don't feel good enough, I constantly worry he will realise I am not equal, I cannot afford the same lifestyle. My stbex left me with so many feelings of low self worth I struggle seeing any good in myself although this has got better than it was.
I have spoken to BF & explained, he was so reassuring, said he is with me for all my qualities that he has always been looking for. That when we are properly together it will be one pot. Its a non issue for him. He said I make him feel loved & secure and more confident (he already is very confident!) and that's why he feels he has been able to make the leap as he has support and love now.
Am I just being very silly??