Clashing since having baby

[segc94]

We've just had a baby who is 3 weeks old. The first week was fine, we worked as a team and got along fine.
However recently we have been clashing, I'm unhappy, he's unhappy. He loses patience with me and DD and gets snappy (more so with me, but he uses 'fed up' tones and sighing if DD is kicking up a fuss when he's getting her changed or changing her nappy etc)

He used to play on his Xbox ALL THE TIME before we had DD, and he still does it now. He's constantly swearing, always chatting to his mates on his headset so he can't hear DD or me properly. He rarely cleans. He has zero motivation towards anything.

Since having a baby it's made me even more frustrated with him... I'm not happy. I feel so down majority of the time. We just seen to tolerate each other. We're on completely different pages all the time.

Despite all of this I don't want to break up with him.. I just want our passion back, I want to feel happy in our relationship and wish he'd give more to our relationship but have no idea where to start.

Also this isn't something I've felt since having DD, it's just gotten worse.

Before you got to the bit about the x-box, I was going to say this is entirely normal, and to cut yourselves some slack.

Many (most?) new parents are anxious. Combine that with lack of sleep, and you tend to get snappy.
However what you say about the X box, the lack of cleaning / contributing / the swearing, is not usually part of it. From what you say though, it was how he was before the baby, not a result of the baby arriving.

Sometimes having a baby just makes those annoying things you use to put up with actually become a problem. It's because you need more help now (you have a baby to look after!) and it feels like you have him to look after too.

He should be stepping up.

Firstly she's only 3 weeks old - WRT getting the passion back, I'm not even sure I realised my DH even existed when DS was that little.

It's much better now (he's 17 months) but parenthood is a bloody hard slog. My DH was always supportive and yours really doesn't sound like he is.

God he wants to try changing the nappy of a toddler who can physically get up and run away while you're doing it!!