I'm looking for advice on how to disentangle myself. I've been in a casual/FWB relationship for almost 6 years. I see myself as single although all this time he has been in the background, happy to see me if I contact him. He is 50, divorced and enjoys his independence.
As a lone parent and student it has been very convenient but time has flown by (I recently posted about being 36 and single). On one hand, sex with him is the best I've ever had, it keeps improving with time and it helps satisfy my a high sex drive. On the surface it seems like a good arrangement in the context of my current hermetic lifestyle, plus we get on well as friends. But on the other, I resent him for not being what I really want as a partner. He claims to love me but has never sought to formalise the relationship, staying on the periphery of my life. We started dating but I wasn't in a good place at the time so slipped into being friends and casual lovers. While he appears to do this with ease, I feel like I am banging my head against a brick wall. I want out.
I've tried to end it numerous times but he always welcomes me back and doesn't take my concerns seriously anymore as I never disappear for long. I find the confusion distracting and my lack of self control in this area dispiriting. I've blocked him today (as I've done before) but feel guilty as we are good friends. How can I make a clean break and be available for something truly life affirming when the time is right?