I just want to make him hurt!!

[user1499288566]

Does anyone else just want to hurt there ex and make them pay for the pain they caused

First off I'm sorry that you have been through a bad breakup with your ex. It's never easy ending a relationship, or a relationship being ended if you aren't the one who finished things.

I think to an extent it is normal to feel hurt to start with but after a certain amount of time, holding onto negative feelings is just unhealthy and will cause more pain in the long run. Do not get stuck in the trap where you can't let go of hating an ex because that really doesn't help anyone and makes you a whole lot more miserable than you should be.

I had a short but intense relationship in my early 20's and was devastated when it ended, felt really bitter towards my ex and hated him for a few months. Ultimately I realised I wasn't doing myself any good and had to let it go. Feeling this way and moving on, it's like a weight has been lifted.

Why spend valuable energy and time hating someone who may not even be giving you a second thought?

It can be a natural feeling to have but it won't do any good will it? It just makes you just as bad as them. Being the bigger person is sometimes the best way to get at someone.

It's not the advice you probably want to hear or think you'll never get there but the best way to hurt them is to get on with your life, find happiness, find someone who loves you for who you are.

Sometimes I have occasions where I want my ex to feel the pain I have been through and still feel that pain sometimes. The Karma bus might hit him/her one day, but the best karma is you bring happy and not giving a shit about your ex.

I'm not quite there, but everyday I get a bit closer

Yes. Very much. But every time I think of a way I realise it'll hurt me more. I'm aiming for 'the best revenge is a life well lived' and fervently hoping that karma exists. And before people pipe up to say that karma doesn't exist, don't bother, I don't want to know because it's the only thing keeping me going some days.

It's been an on going battle, I ended it because I couldn't take anymore, he has done that much to hurt me , make me loose me , we have a child, iv delt with all that alone, he has done nothing but spoil my life, and all i did is give him the best of me, I believe in karma but so much right now I want him to hurt and feel the pain I bear inside, I have that much hate inside, yet I'm ment to be okay for our child, be okay be cool and calm ect , it's wrong the lot of it , people who do hurtful things don't stand fully by there kids hurt people them trying to be there for them , they don't deserve anything, where is the justice in that? People say it's for the kid it's only right it's only fair ect but why would you want a piece of weak worthlessness shit around you're kid , why would the kid want them? Sorry for the rant I'm not like this at all , I'm just so full of heartache pain, sorry

Rant away...those of going through it understand

*those of us

I'm sorry you're in so much pain op. Lots on here know exactly how you are feeling, so keep talking.

Unfortunately there are no easy answers. It gets easier with time, and you begin to care less. It helped me to stop thinking of the years I wasted and instead focus on the years I could have wasted.

At the end of the day, despite all the injustice and anger, I'd rather be you than him. Imagine being him, in his head, with his thoughts. No, much better to be a good person working through all the crap being dealt you.

Pick your battles, pick yourself up and work towards the sort of life you want because you being happy, you winning, is what will really unsettle him.

Thank you for understand, and not saying I'm just mad lol means a lot, sometimes you need to say how you feel I guess

How do you move forward when you still have to have them in your life