Confused about sexuality

[NotOprah]

I'm a regular poster but have namechanged for obvious reasons.

The title says it all really. I've been seeing a wonderful bloke for about 7 months now and prior to that I had been single for about a year. Before that I had a relationship with another woman. It was my first time with another woman and it felt right. When we split up I wasn't looking to date anyone else but when I met dp it really did just sort of happen. The closer we get the more scared I am that I don't really love him in the same way he loves me.

How do I deal with these conflicting feelings and make sense of them? I am spending far too much time thinking about what to do about this. Do I throw away a good relationship and try to work out who I am? I'm not bothered about being gay. I really don't know if I am. I do know that I would love to be with a woman again and that as lovely as dp is, he isn't the one.

I feel so confused.

If he isn't the one then why carry on the relationship even if you are not gay? Maybe you are Bisexual? I think you do need time to sort through these things. Maybe go to a few places where other gay women conregate.

would you rather have sex with dp or a woman?

i think the issue is whether you are happy in this relationship, not the gender of the person you are with, tbh.

OTOH, I am bi, I KNOW where you are coming from I think. relationships with women and with men are in many ways quite different in functional terms, IME, quite aside from actual personality differences.

I don't think you can ever decide once and for all about your sexuality. I think you can only work on a case by case basis.

Obviously that massivley oversimplifies the issue. If you decide you want more relationships with women it would not be a bad idea to make this in some way known so that you can locate said women.

awww-take care. It can be bloody confusing and hard, I know.

unless you want to have a relationship with a person based on the wrong reasons, you should probably figure out who you are attracted to.
its not great fun to go to bed next to someone you are not attracted to.

sure it is a case by case basis, agreed, but the case you have now seems to be dp or other women. you wrote it in your post.

and dont think about him when you try to answer that, only about how you feel,