We've been married for 6 years but on and off together for 25. My DH has always had trouble controlling his temper and I thought I knew what I was getting into when I agreed to marry him. He hadn't lost control for about a year prior to our marriage and I thought he'd finally grown up.
However, in the past year things have got a lot worse and he loses it a couple of times a week. He is not violent just abusive and insulting and likes to slam doors and sulk for long periods. I really feel at our age (late 40s) that he is regressing.
Doing anything with him in public with our three smallish DCs invariably ends in disaster as somebody will annoy him and he will lose it. Usually it is me who gets it in the neck and the DCs are not unaware of what is going on.
So, I feel I have no choice but to present him with an ultimatum. Either he seeks counselling or we're separating. He will not take this well as he has already flatly refused to seek any professional help. He promised me last weekend that he would make a serious effort to control his anger but it flared up again just last night. This was particularly humiliating as we had guests.
I'm just afraid that he won't take my ultimatum seriously. He thinks I'm vastly overestimating the problem and that I enjoy a bit of drama.
In the past he usually managed to wear me down and everything would be fine for a few weeks until it happened again. I'm feeling like a fool. I just need to be sure I'm doing the right thing. Thanks for reading....