Sorry if this is long. Need some perspective and advice.
Went out with and co-habited with A for 2.5 years, officially separated but co-habiting for about the last 5 months or so. Still share a house but separate beds. Little relationship as such, for about 6 months before official separation.
I love him deeply and have always felt I would do anything for him, to the point the relationship was a little bit hero-worship. He has MH problems - PTSD and depression. These manifested in him withdrawing entirely emotionally and physically. He was often horrible to me - shouting and as I said refusing to speak to me for long periods of time, telling me he didn't care about me, had no interest in marriage etc.
New information that has come to light from him is he has a history of treating all his girlfriends appallingly and pushing them away. He doesn't want to do this self-destructive behaviour but cannot control it. He recently told me to find someone new.
I have recently done so.
During the early part of our relationship A supported me financially with quitting my job, retraining and starting my own business which is now doing relatively well. He worked himself to the ground, perpetuating these MH issues, we feel.
He has 'found god' and seems to be coming out of his depression and for the last few weeks has been happier and wanting to engage with me.
My new relationship with D is becoming serious - both saying we are starting to fall in love, thinking about each other all the time, he has talked about buying somewhere for us to live in together. All new and exciting, but uncommonly strong feelings I think.
A has recently known about D and now said he wants to try again, draw a line under everything that has happened and 'would consider' marriage.
I am completely torn. Do I try again with A who has a history of treating me badly but this is due to MH issues that he will work on resolving? We could be great again and he's the first person I've loved truely, madly, deeply.
D dotes on me, we have fun and laugh together he is frank and open about his feelings for me and I him and we 'click' in a way I didn't think possible with anyone else.
He has a history of only short term relationships, max 2 years which concerns me and of course I've only known him for a few short weeks. We have an incredible emotional and physical connection.
Please help wise mums-netters - I don't want to string either along.
I'm mid 30's, both A and B are mid 40's.