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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Friendship

2 replies

sorryoldwoman · 06/08/2017 19:38

I have a friend that I've know since I was a teenager. We've been close off and on. She has a difficult family life and herself difficult because she is always giving advice and she has the answer for everyone's problems but her own. I've always been there for her and I always just listen and hardly ever give advice because she knows best. That being said I've not talked to her since I left my husband for someone else and we were divorcing. The other man was controlling and difficult so I was going to be on my own but my husband wants to give it another chance. She's called him a few times being nosey and he's told her we are working things out and to leave it to us handle it.Hes not gonna discuss it with her. She has texted me saying we need to sit down and talk. I don't want to talk to her or answer her questions and be judged by her. She tells me all her families failings and I'm sure she's talked about me. They avoid her and she's clueless to as why. I seem to be the only one who can take her for long periods. She's been a good friend but she's very religious and I know she will make me feel like a disobedient child. I'm an adult and I take responsibility for my actions and my right to my decisions. Do I just say hi how are you doing and if she gets nosy say I don't want to discuss it? It will always be a elephant in the room.

OP posts:
scoobydoo1971 · 06/08/2017 20:11

I would keep this woman at a distance while you sort out matters with your husband. She may just be bored and self important so uses 'advice' as a channel for her own needs. Your suggested solution of telling her to back off if the most appropriate action, as you do need to concentrate on getting your relationship back on track.

sorryoldwoman · 06/08/2017 20:25

Thank you yes she puts herself in so many people's lives it's best to not contact her. We are even discussing moving away for a new start so I could possibly never see her again.

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