Hi there I've just asked my DH if I could look to arrange a spa overnight stay, one night in hotel with spa treatment, two day break tops with some old buddies who live a good distance away. They are a mixture of married and singletons, I haven't seen them for a long time. DH has hit the roof! I'm 'selfish' I have 'such a hard life don't I?' And it 'doesn't sit well with him at all'. I didn't expect this reaction, we can afford it, we are paying for several new things lately, so I get that it may be bad timing but I was quite hurt by his reaction if I'm honest. I'm not a whiny person by any means! He knows I've been worn down lately, had a virus for several weeks and then the DDs were ill, lasted a while. I've been feeling low lately, I think just the general grind, and not being able to even clean the house properly.
I'm on ML until end of September, but really feeling the strain of looking after my 3.5 DD and 8 mo DD, I love them to pieces of course but the youngest has been a lot of hard work, colic, clingy, dairy intolerance, hard time teething. I don't get a lot of time to do any housework, or gardening. My mother is disabled and my dad has health problems so they can babysit only really in the evenings for maybe a cinema trip once in a blue moon, but usually we are just so knackered, it doesn't happen. My MIL comes to stay, she can be helpful but overbearing, it can be a very complicated and tense situation at times. My DH seems to think we both get a break then but usually, MIL has one and I'll have the other, DH gets free time. When both MIL and DIL come to stay and fight with each other, it's tense and awkward. DIL can be quite insulting, and criticises us for things we haven't done around the house and garden, he's never had to rear children, different generation I suppose. The last time they stayed it was so upsetting for me, I called the GP and discussed ADs, but thought I could power through for a while and see how I am. DIL was spoiling for a fight with me, at one point, and even called my eldest DD a 'silly bitch' which totally crossed the line and I told DH this, but of course he defends DIL. Needless to say they knew I was upset as DIL isn't going to stay with us next time! Not my decision, they know what he is like.
My DH hasn't had the DDs on his own for a day yet, max. 2 hours say. He has two days off a week, and will have the baby on his own for three days a week when I go back to work, but he's already looking to take them to his sisters for one of those days so he can work instead.
I've never spent any length of time away from DH or DDs, probably 8 hours at the longest. Never spent a night away from the girls at all, with or without DH. DH has done work things, and overnight trips, but not since the youngest was born.
AIBU to want some space from everyone? Just one weekend?
I dread the in laws coming down again as it's no where near a break. Maybe I'll feel better when I start work as that will be a break- sort of.