Only married 4 years. 2 dc. Feel utterly heartbroken and alone. He is everyone's favourite person, the most popular man you could imagine. I'm the more serious/ hard one. Except I'm not really, and behind closed doors he is increasingly horrible to me. Criticises the way I parent, puts pressure on me to be 'fun', tells me I'm boring because I don't want to drink any more (I'm too tired, haven't slept for more than a few hours for nearly a year now). I went back to work at 12 weeks with dc2 as we need my wage, but he criticises me for not leaving the children more, comparing me to his friends' wives who all like going out and partying. He makes me feel like nothing I do or am is good enough and that I am a disappointment to him. But I feel disappointed too that he is so disinterested in actually being a family man. He puts on a show of it in front of people but the reality is that he never does a night waking, never has, if I leave him with the dc they barely get fed and he will not follow any routine at all so I come back to exhausted starving children who are distressed. He then tells me they're only like that because I never leave them. So everything is my fault. I hate him. Hate what he has turned me into. Hate that I am trapped with him, and hate that everyone we know thinks I'm the luckiest woman in the world being married to mr charming. No one would believe me if I told them the truth. I feel so alone.