Missing people

[Pinkmoon2]

Hi,

I've wrote here before but here I am back. Before I got married I was a little panicked as I felt I had caught feelings for a coworker along with some other problems. It was a very tough time for me.I got great advice here and in RL. I am now married over a year and a half.

I'm finishing the job in a number of weeks and I'm feeling sad I won't see my coworkers anymore but especially him. We are close friends in there so that's normal enough but because of the confusion last year about my feelings, I'm feeling guilty that I'm so sad about not seeing him anymore. It's more like I'm worried it will be hard & it's making me question why I'm worried so much! I literally just enjoy his company. I'll miss him terrible but he is my friend and we have worked together years so I guess that is normal.I just feel silly about it, will probably cry leaving the place.

Am I being too hard on myself or overthinking this?

Any advice would be great! Hard to talk about in RL.

If your feelings are purely about missing his friendship then I think it's not unexpected to feel sad. Regardless of gender, finding good friends, who we care about and who care about us, is hugely important to our mental wellbeing. Can you stay in touch?

You don't 'catch' feelings, you decide to allow yourself to have them.

Des your DH know you have allowed yourself to get so bound up with another man in a way that it sounds as if you are positively hankering after him, and even pre-emptively stoking up drama?

It's no harder to leave any one group of colleagues than another when your work takes you onwards. You can choose to remind yourself of this whenever you have inappropriate thoughts about another man.

I think severing contact with him cannot come soon enough, unless you are seeking a way to end you marriage.

Onemorecupofteafortheroad:
Thanks, ah yeh we probably will. After writing this out I felt much better, I think I was just overthinking. It is hard leaving a job! Change is good though.

Auntie Stella: you've got me all wrong. If you saw the state I was in when that happened you would understand how much Pain I went through for even liking someone else and how much I love my husband.
However I appreciate the advice.