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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Blame Shifting

2 replies

tigercub50 · 25/07/2017 18:34

I have posted a fair bit about my marriage & things are soooo much better but I am finding one thing in particular quite frustrating. Just to say that it certainly doesn't happen every time but sometimes when I call DH on how he's spoken to me,for example, he will turn things around & talk about how I am behaving. It's like he just doesn't want to accept any responsibility. The other day I shouted downstairs " Do you want a cuppa?"& he replied (quite grumpily I thought) " If you want". When I was making the tea I said ( keeping it light) " You could maybe say please " & then I was accused of telling DH off in front of DD. I started to talk about what happened & DH said I should know by looking on his laptop that he was busy when I asked him & that's why he replied as he did - but I was upstairs! Then I said he couldn't expect me to know what he was doing & he said he wasn't expecting me to do anything. This is where the frustration comes in because he has an answer for everything & there is always an excuse. I wish he could just say sorry for speaking to me like he did & that would be it! He does apologise but then it happens again. We're all grouchy sometimes, I know, but is it really that hard to hold your hands up? Any thoughts?

OP posts:
tigercub50 · 25/07/2017 19:22

Anyone out there?

OP posts:
Amelia4991 · 25/07/2017 20:14

Sounds strange..

Maybe something else on his mind causing stress. Maybe woke up on wrong side of the bed. Just one of those days...

Just say sorry and leave it as that.
See if it happens again if it does ask him what's up!? Try to dig deeper but doing so without ending it in an argument

Relationship are very difficult Hmm

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