How can I trust dp after abusive ex?

[ladymadonna]

Hi, just wondering if anyone else has been through this or has any advice at all.

I've been living with my dp for over a year now. He is a wonderful, gentle person and I know (rationally) that he would never hurt me. The problem is I can't bring myself to fully trust him and I am constantly expecting him to fly off the handle and behave like my ex. On the rare occasions that he goes out drinking without me I sit at home and worry about what could happen when he returns, but of course he has never been violent towards me. It's beginning to affect our relationship and I don't know what I'd do without him!
And advice?

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Have you or would you go to counselling?

Does he know about your ex?
I'm sure he can understand that you are a little fragile.
I had an abusive partner and found it very hard to trust anyone afterwards, he made me feel worthless and to this day i still don't belive my DP when he tells me i'm not.
I don't have any solutions to help you but don't stress yourself over it it will get easier.

Thanks for your replies. I was put on a waiting list for counselling some time ago, still waiting for it!
DP does know about it and is very understanding but he feels frustrated and offended that I can?t accept that he is different. I can relate to what you said about feeling worthless Charlee, I shouldn?t let what he did to me still affect my life but it?s so hard to get past it. I?m glad that things can get better, that gives me hope!