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Original poster

Sending follow up messages

11 replies

Ironicuser123 · 21/07/2017 00:09

Interested in views. If you chat online to someone frequently and they usually respond promptly and you know they have seen the message, what's a reasonable time to send a follow- up message without looking needy?

OP posts:
MissBax · 21/07/2017 00:10

Was the last message a question? If so I would leave it, if a natural end of conversation then maybe the next day to begin a new topic?

Havalina · 21/07/2017 02:07

Depends if you have something to say to them? A needy are you not talking to me? Is different to a piece of news, or relevant comment. Also depends on the relationship I suppose.

TheNaze73 · 21/07/2017 09:02

Like the others have said, it depends if it warrants an answer. Big difference if the message was a timebound question or a statement.
A lot depends on what they're doing at the time too.
If I was out, regardless it would be the following day

WifeyFish · 21/07/2017 09:23

I think it depends on the context of chatting online. For example if it's an old friend who you mainly stay in touch with online I don't see the harm in a follow up message a few days later if you have something to say. If however it's someone you've never met and only chat to online I'd probably just leave it.

Shoxfordian · 21/07/2017 10:11

Don't double message anyone

Girlywurly · 21/07/2017 18:09

There is no reasonable time frame: just don't do it.

If they wanted to be talking to you, they would be.

misit · 21/07/2017 18:25

I'm with Shox, no double messaging, they've read it, leave it.

HotNatured · 21/07/2017 19:00

Why send a follow up? Pressure and neediness are super unattractive

Original poster
Ironicuser123 · 21/07/2017 23:58

Interesting! I think I need some tactics to avoid double messaging. You're right those who have said it - it's unattractive.

Rational me tells myself they are either not responding because they are busy (in which case leave them alone and chill out) or because they need space (in which case messaging won't help) but my fingers just won't stop ...

OP posts:
TokenGinger · 22/07/2017 15:13

I honestly think it depends.

When on POF, I got so many messages, I coils quite easily receive one, read it, get distracted by a phone call and that message could fall down by 15 messages by the time I next log on, and it could have slipped my mind I'd read it. So by somebody messaging again, I wouldn't think it was needy, it was a pleasant reminder.

But if it happens every time or frequently, then yes, I would avoid double messaging.

Queenofthedrivensnow · 22/07/2017 15:46

About 24 hours I reckon then after that assume the iron is cold. Come and join us on the dating thread x

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