My wife has a mental illness

[user1499418528]

My wife has a mental illness and wants to separate.

We have had a lot of stresses over the last 3 years and she has had enough. She does not care who has the children. She wants her freedom and has started dating. She says she is a feminist and wants to keep men at a distance - even though she has slipped back into using dating as finding company. She says she is depressed.

With two kids concerned what do I do after trying external advice and talking to her? I do not control her thoughts. She says she is a step away from suicide.

Has she got access to professional support? Is she on any medication?

Might be worth considering posting this on the MH board too for more specialist advice.

It's not easy. I've got MH problems and tbh my DH has had to put up with so much, especially in the last few months. Hang in there, and he as much support for yourself as you possibly can

Your first priority has to be the dc's welfare. Is your wife able to care for them safely? It maybe better if you are the resident parent if you have concerns. Whilst also offering access when your wife wants to see them.

You can only encourage your wife to seek help but you cannot 'fix' her as hard as it is for you no doubt to see her unwell. Are there any family who your wife may feel more able to talk to rather than you?

You also need to look after yourself and be the stable parent for your children. I hope things work out and your wife gets the help she needs. That may or may not lead to a reconciliation depending on the issues you allude to in your post. Do not pressurise her to make any long term decisions at the moment though.

You need to keep her away from the children if she is very unwell. She sounds dangerous.