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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DP being very unsupportive about a bereavement

26 replies

ohhbother · 05/07/2017 23:09

Hi,
DP and I have had our fair share of problems but have been working hard to rectify them. He has empathy issues (not just with me) and finds it hard to put himself in other people's shoes.
This is something I usually deal with as it doesn't really affect us.
Yesterday I lost my grandpa - quite unexpectedly. I hadn't seen him in 5 years as he lives in Australia and it hit me a lot harder than I anticipated.
He was kind for a little while - asking if I was okay, did I want to talk etc and then had to go to work. When he came home from work he moaned about his day and went to bed. Today from the minute he has got up he has constantly nagged.
I've just broken down in tears and told him he's not being fair and I need his support right now. He got really arsey and mumbled that 'I'm making myself a victim and actually I've done nothing but moan today'
I'm so upset, I can't believe that in a time like this he still can't put my feelings first.
I don't really know what to do now as I'm pretty upset but feel a bit embarrassed and hell will freeze over before he apologises without prompting.
I don't know if this is the final straw. I feel like it might be a little bit. I can't help but think that if something even more traumatic happens in the future I will also be dealing with it alone.

OP posts:
ThePinkOcelot · 08/07/2017 23:21

Is that not the whole point of Mumsnet Neutrogena?! What a bloody stupid comment.
Hope you're ok OP.

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