I'll preface this by saying I'm still so angry at my exH, just the fact that he breathes annoys me, so it's hard to be objective about his parenting. But I'm sick of him claiming to be a devoted father when I feel he's nothing of the sort.
We were married 6 years, during that time he was emotionally abusive to the point where I was under the MH crisis team when I finally asked him to leave. He left for one week then announced he was moving back into HIS house because he'd been away from the boys for too long (he'd been in to put them to bed every night that week). He proposed living independently in the box room. I begged him to reconsider but he wouldn't, I even asked him to wait 24 hours so that I could speak to my HV about what impact this living arrangement would have on the boys but he refused. There was no way I could be under the same roof as him and told him if he moved back I'd take the boys and leave but he insisted. I took the boys to stay with my dad, thinking he'd leave when he realised I meant it.
Fast forward 2 years, I'm no longer living with my dad obviously but he's still living in the former marital home, a 3 bedroom property that he pays no rent or mortgage on, and sees nothing wrong with the fact that his children are living in a rented 2 bedroom flat. He sees them every other weekend Friday - Monday but I've recently said he can't have them Sunday night as he never gets DS2 to nursery on time. He sees them one day in the weekends in between.
He never phones them. When we recently moved I said he could pop in and see them one evening in the week if he wanted, he's never taken me up on it.
The CSA recommends he pays £80 per week child maintenance, it works out he pays £93 per week (£400 a month) and I'm sick of him going on about how he's paying more than the CSA recommendation, whilst conveniently ignoring the fact that I'm paying £150 a month to clear a debt he saddled me with when we split up.
He's never been to a single class assembly or school play ever yet claims he's closely involved with the school community. After we split he became an associate governor of the school; the headmaster phoned me to tell me he was suspicious of his motives but couldn't stop him applying to become one.
Sorry this has turned into an epic rant, he just makes me so bloody furious.