Please comment on this incident

[mikado1]

Ds (5) pulls runner on the bed in anger, disturbing my folded clothes. I told him he needed to put things back as they were. Before he did, DH straightened runner so I whispered 'He's to do it', at which he threw it around agsin and said 'Bloody he'll, fine', really annoyed. So I said 'good reaction', considering our son needs to learn about appropriate reactions. He then picked up a bundle of coins and threw them on the floor while muttering under his breath. I said 'good modelling' (I know I know, i just wanted to make a point and knew ds wouldn't get what I was saying. He then came over to me and hissed 'Dont you tucking speak to me like that'. He then went into the bathroom and loudly banged things around. My ds1 then got up and started fixing my clothes..

I know I haven't covered myself in glory here either but feel I cannot communicate with him. What are your thoughts on this incident, as an outsider?

I think your DH overreacted massively and needs to control his temper and stop throwing tantrums.

so you have two children in the house....?

Thanks both. Apologies I've somehow double posted.

Is this part of a pattern of domineering, aggressive behaviour and making you walk on eggshells? He's trying to put you in your 'place', as a woman, which he sees as subordinate to him as man and therefore king of the house.
I would consider whether you want this type of role modelling for your DS around long term.

Was dp in the room to hear you asking dc to do it?

That's my worry keeping. Yes MsMarvel, he was.