Support....

[gemh1984]

Hi this is my first post and really not 100% sure what I'm hoping to get out of putting this out there.....

I've recently (in the last 2 weeks) decided to separate from my husband. I no longer love him and don't feel like we're in a husband/wife relationship, more like friends living together.

This has been on going for the last 3 years and every 6 months we basically go through the same cycle. I get upset and we promise to make changes to improve the situation and then it just goes back the way things were.

So today, I'm going to view some flats so I can move out during July.

I've now told my parents about the separation and just feel like, they don't have any faith in me coping by myself. I'm 32 and have previously lived in house shares and this will be the first time I'll be all by myself in my own home.

I know they are probably just worried about me. I just didn't think it was very supportive. I got asked if I was sure I'm making the right decision - yes I don't want to be with someone I don't love and who doesn't make me happy. I certainly don't feel like I make him happy either.

I think the problem is everyone just sees him a really nice person and he is but I just don't click with him anymore and I'm fed up of trying to.

My mother just started crying...... not sure what to make of that.

I'm feeling a bit down about it all today and hoping it will get better once I make the move.

Thanks for reading

I've been in a similar situation, op. I left my rather nasty exh & my dps were very surprised & "are you sure?" Etc. I was verý disappointed, but the fact was i'd worked very hard to cover up the unpleasantless & hide my unhappiness from them. They'll see the change in you over time & realise you've done the right thing.

Thanks for the reply, it makes me feel better about the situation.

Good luck with everything. It's really hard, even when you're the one that has ended it.

I agree with PP. I left my ex. Everyone was shocked, he was devastated. My mum tried to talk me into staying, she said she and DF have 'had their ups and downs'. I welled up as at times I've no idea how they stayed together and sometimes they've both been miserable. I felt really unsupported.

However I battled on, focused on my own place. It's 2 years later now, my home is an oasis, I'm 3 stone lighter, I see my friends lots or veg out on my own, go to the gym, new DP. All is good. Just keep looking forward. You will get through this by being selfish just for now until you're out. You really won't look back

Thanks for the messages, feeling better