Uncomfortable with this (sexual content)

[flippantlydetermined]

My DP puts his finger in my bottom. I don't like it. He is really rough and I tell him it hurts and he ignores me.

He's great apart from this.

That's not on OP.
I'm sure someone will be along shortly to give you some useful advice and help you.
for you, for what it's worth, I would LTB.

He's really great apart from the fact that he forcibly penetrates your anus while disregarding any feelings about it you have I'd argue that actually he's a sex offender who doesn't give a fuck about you or your wellbeing. He hurts you and knows that and still carried on?! Leave him OP, he's vile. No means no.

LTB

Do it back to him wearing rubber washing up gloves of course and see how he likes it.

Shove a dildo up his arse, ignore his complaints and see what he's saying.

Er yeah... that's sexual abuse.

Um, that's not great. He's sexually assaulting you - doing something he knows is unwelcome and you don't like.

Wouldn't make me want to shag him

What does he say when you tell him to stop it? Have you talked about it when you're not having sex? Why does he do it?

He's great apart from being a rapist. So he's not great. You don't have to put up with that.

He says I will enjoy it but I don't.

If it was something he experimented with during the act (sort of heat of the moment thing) and he listened after you said you don't like it then I'd talk about it and move on.

If it was uncomfortable because he did it rough with no lube, he's tried again (having maybe thought you meant it was rough first time so he'd try again and make it less rough) but you'd be open to trying it properly in future the talk and move on.

If he's just repeatedly ignoring you and doing something uncomfortable and with total disregard for your body and rights then I'd be out of there because he's a disrespectful twat.

That is sexual assault. You need to walk away. I know it is scary to leave a relationship, but this is really not okay and you deserve better. Sorry you are going through this

You've told him no!!! How bloody dare he do it again!! It's your body. I'm sorry but I'd tell him to go. A loving partner respects your boundaries and he's penetrating you without your consent. That's serious sexual assault

He's a lovely person, it's like he gets carried away?

He doesn't get carried away, he knows exactly what he is doing and he simply doesn't care. Not about you, not about your boundaries and certainly not about hurting you, physically and emotionally.
That is not a lovely person, and I am so sorry this has happened to you

No he is not a lovely person, lovely people stop when asked to and don't do it again. He is abusive.

Agree entirely with Everything's post. He knows exactly what he's doing. He is not 'lovely'. He's sexually abusive. I'm incensed for you

I have been reading about abuse on here. And it's hard because I know him, and he doesn't seem like an abuser, just my boyfriend.

if you've told him you don't like it and he persists in doing it, you should finish with him.

Most of us get "carried away" during sex but it it doesn't excuse doing stuff that the other person has clearly said they don't like.

You need to have a serious conversation with him out of the bedroom telling him you do not enjoy it, never will so don't do it. If he does it again there will be serious consequences. If he's lovely then he'll be horrified he's hurt you. If he's a scumbag then he'll minimise and deflect it back to you.

Of course you could just ltb but I'm getting the vibe that you're not ready for that yet.

Lots of people enjoy & engage in anal play & know doubt that was probably the norm in his previous relationships.

However, he's crossed a massive boundary as no means no. He sounds abusive to me. Getting too excited is no excuse whatsoever

He's not great or lovely, he is sexually assaulting you regularly.

Something has made you look on here OP. I'm guessing you know it's not right and you're seeking some reassurance. The responses you are getting are spot on. I'm sorry you're struggling with this.

My ex used to do this and I hated it. He also wouldn't listen when I objected and insisted I would like it if I let him do it. In the end his obsession with my anus became one of the main reasons I ended it with him. I then met my now dh and he also tried the finger in the bum thing. I told him no because I didn't want anything up my bum and he stopped immediately. In the 12 years we've been together he has never once tried to do anything in that area again or asked me to do anything involving my bum. The difference between these two men is that one man respected my wishes and the other didn't. Think about it.

Why do they do it, what's in it for them??