Advice for Newly singles

[user1496940061]

Hi
I'm soon to be a single dad with 2 kids 50% of the time

Im in early 40s and wanted advice on being single again after 15 +years, how to cope financially, mentally etc.

The whole spilt thing has happened so quick that it's a bit of a shock so Im up and down at the moment

Also best way to move forward and keep busy
And one day start to look for a new GF

Thanks all

Same situation so I'd also like to know too. Chin up fella and keep moving forward.

I'm concentrating on building a solid co-parenting relationship, fixing the house for sale and making sure that the kids feel loved. I'll worry about the whole GF thing a long way down the line, my head's nowhere near ready for any of that yet. Best of luck to you, hope you find a direction that works for you.

I'm a single mum but have met a few newly single dads on the dating scene. I would say definitely spend some time resettling and focusing on looking after yourself really well in the early days. The single dads I have met I think have gone back on to the dating scene far too early to be emotionally ready and I think this leads to even more complications down the line. You sound like you've got a wise head on you though.

There's also a lone parent part of mumsnet for when you might need it. My tips. Be organised. Really organised. If they are old enough give them chores.

I'm a single parent so it's a little different but I would also say make the most of your time alone. Don't mope. See friends and family.

A lot of co-parent threads I read say keep double of everything if you can, 1 in each household. Clothes etc

Good luck and don't get back out on the dating scene until you are good and ready. One of the best gifts you can give yourself is being happy in your own company.

Thanks for the advice and support.
I'll take a look at the single parent link.

There's so much to deal with and sort out. It's pretty daunting.

I was like you 4 years ago , I also had the children 50/50 when I had them I focused on keeping life normal for them with loads of fun time. When I didn't have them I opened up my social life and made lots of new friends..don't go looking for another relationship until you are 100% ready just enjoy your new found singledom.

Sorry Just to add I was also early 40s and had been married 20years ...things cannot be better for all of us at the minute .

Bob - any tips on making new friends ? I have a great bunch of close friends but could do with other interests.

Five a side football? There are usually leagues run at the local sports centre. If you're near a river try seeing if there's a dragon boat club (good fun and the crewing is always pretty mixed ability).

Otherwise there are groups you can join which basically go and try new things every few weeks - a female friend of mine swore by it as a way of making friends. Unfortunately I can't think of the name of it, but it's probably easily found on google. You pay a small sub and then extra depending on how expensive the activity is. Anything from hiking to tandem skydiving.

Meet up is a very good website to join
Loads of groups, social outings etc in your area (when you register)
Lots of opportunities to meet up socially and make new friends on this site. Go for it, you will find something local to you

Thanks again. I'll take a look, sounds like they will keep me busy and keep my mind off things.
It's tough when ex is already 'moving on' within a week if splitting !

As recommended on the above posts I like walking so joined a meet up
Group and go walking in the hills , the good thing I found was that a lot of the people are in similar situations so many shared experiences but also lots of new friendships have been formed . I also started cycling and get out regularly with friends old and new .