Boyfriend called me a 'bi**h'

[emmad1980]

Ok my boyf and I split a few weeks back. We met up and went back to his. We were on his sofa kissing etc! And he says.. cringe! "You di*y b**h".. how would u feel? Hes said it once before too..it felt edp cringe this time as we hadnt seen each other for a while due to split and we had just got back to his and only om sofa! ...seemed imapropriate! It makes me cringe but some couples talk like that?

He hasn't got much, if any respect for you has he? This and your other thread suggest there is nothing positive about this man at all, why are you together again?

emmad1980 I really hope you can leave this man and concentrate on a happy life with your son. I understand you want to be with someone but don't let that make you settle for someone entirely unpleasant who treats you with such a lack of respect. Enjoy time with your son and if you find someone great then that's a bonus, but don't go out with someone just for the sake of it - let alone someone as unpleasant as this character.

Stop looking for excuses for this man's behaviour.

You already have a lengthy thread running where every single poster has told you that is is a controlling twat and that you need to dump him.

You say that he's good with your son, but what he actually does is uses him as a weapon and is teaching him to repeat passive aggressive comments about you. This is going to be incredibly damaging for your son in the long term.

Stop prevaricating, put your son's best interests first and ditch the twat.

... and stop using asterisks. We can all swear on Mumsnet. And we can all work out what you're saying! Either don't swear if the words offend you so much, or just write them in full.

It would be difficult not to swear if quoting the word in question, and I can understand finding it extremely unpleasant.

So you split up 2 weeks ago, and, despite your long thread, just 2 days ago, got back with him and now you are asking what to do about the things that he does that you don't like.

Seriously. Get rid. Life is too short for this misery. Don't even think about hanging on and having babies with him because he won't respect you as their mother and you'll do it all wrong. Then if you finally do see sense, you're stuck with him in your life until they're grown up.

If you had split up why did you see him again? Has he been asking to meet?

Really he sounds awful. Yes contempt is all I see from him. He seems to think it's ok to belittle everything, the fact you need a rest, the very fact that you're seeing him again. He isn't nice at all.

Oh for goodness sake emmad1980 you got plenty of good advice on your long thread from 2 days ago He's an arsehole, same as he was before, so what do you want people to say now?

You agsin ?

Although your timings are not quite adding up, emma

Fine if you both like that kind of dirty talk but surely any sane person would find out first?

In ordinary 'vanilla' relationships in want of a better word I don't get why you'd use bitch, slut etc it seems very woman hating.

I read a fair bit of erotica and even erotic coupling type stories use this trope - even with virgins/haven't had sex for 5 years/very conservative woman. It's bizarre and probably from porn.

There's no male equivalent too.

If I was doing a guy and said, 'get down and lick me you shitty little bastard' it would probably end in me being dumped or at very least sworn at.

Considering he's a dick in other aspects, if cut my losses.

Oh I didn't realise it was you again.

All the advice on the other thread stands. Why did you ask him round? I thought you should break up then and I still think so

He called you a BITCH (in caps in case you are cringing so much at writing the word, it is blinding you to the meaning of it!)!

He uses your child against you (watch where that goes!)

He belittles you, and doesn't actually like you very much.

Dump him

Or get more of the same. He will not change - either you put up with it or you get away from it. No other choice.

Him! Fucks sake woman, do you need a bill board outside of your house saying "100% of mumsnestters say this man is a controlling bellend. Get fucking rid!"?
He will wear you down to the ground. He will make your little boy a carbon copy of him.