Good alternatives to face-to-face counselling?

[TheLegendofGreySock]

DP and I have been together for twelve years and have two young children.

Lately we argue, constantly, It upsets our eldest and is really affecting me badly. He's sleeping in the spare room to "get some peace".

We're struggling financially, which doesn't help the situation. We have a small business together which is not doing very well at the moment.

This means that face-to-face counselling (around £50 per session, where we are in Gloucestershire) is not feasible for us. It would be ideal, because DP has a tendency to try to embarrass/humiliate me in front of other people, so I thought a counsellor witnessing that would be useful.

Has anyone used any other form of counselling successfully, please? I won't be able to encourage DP to read a self-help book.

I want to make this work for the children, but also for me.

Thank you.

I'm wondering WHY you want to go in to counselling with a man who belittles you?

Would you consider going on the your own?

I thought relates did some telephone counselling, or by email?

My counsellor skypes people who can't get to her. I would have thought costs were the same ie £40 for 50 minutes.

Your time would be better employed contacting Womens Aid on 0808 2000 247. Also counselling for your own self alone would be helpful to work out why your boundaries are so poor; he has done a real number on you. Give Relate a wide berth in any case.

Abuse is not just physical in nature. Why do you want to make this work at all, what you are showing the children here is a dysfunctional relationship where you as their mother is being emotionally abused. Would you want this type of relationship for them too, your eldest is already upset by what is happening at home. Do not therefore continue to shackle your own self to him.

There is no counselling method that will help him because he feels entitled to act like this and he feels he has done nothing wrong here.

Joint counselling with someone who belittles you is a complete non starter; there is also nothing to rescue and or save here. You do realise that he is abusing you and in turn your children as well don't you?.

The only acceptable level of abuse in a relationship is NONE. This individual crossed that line.