I am frustrated. And I'm starting to feel like a really bad person. I have a lovely husband. He is kind and we were best friends for many years. But I feel like we have grown apart. I feel like I changed who I was/wanted to be for him. We have 3 young children, which I know can put a downer on many persons sex drive. He seems so far away. He's not romantic in any way. It seems like he has completely lost his sex drive. And to be perfectly honest, I feel like he is now a very lazy lover. There is no passion. If I pounce on him, the timing is wrong.
I have talked to him many times over the past few years about this. To ask what has happened to us; to ask if he still finds me attractive (I have put on 2 stone in 2 years) but he insists he's just tired, its not a good time etc I will admit it has contributed towards depression for me (there are other factors at play here, too long to go into). I've suggested counselling. He's not interested. But I've got to the point now where I'm asking myself whether I can handle this for the rest of my married life. And I don't want to. I just don't really know what to do anymore. How important are affection and sex to you? I'm starting to wonder whether I'm just really shallow. Before anyone asks, I really don't believe he is having an affair. He honestly wouldn't have the time. I think I know him well enough to say that with confidence. Please just give me some thoughts. I don't have anyone else to talk to about this as everyone thinks he's perfect. Thank you for reading if you have got this far. X