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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What would you do? (mother & holiday related)

10 replies

coconutcattery · 03/06/2017 14:32

Difficult situation here, recently my ex cheated on me and in a week's time, we were supposed to be going on holiday with my mum. Obviously, he is no longer coming. My mum can be a fairly difficult person but she would never 'act out' in front of him and they got along well, so it would have been fine. The reason we were going together is because she doesn't really have anyone else in her life to go with. My exdp is really easy to get along with so would have been fine.

However, she's been very angry about the holiday thing since I told her, and made a big fuss about having lost a lot of money (she hasn't lost anything, actually- he paid for his share, which is the only thing we've lost). She kept saying how he'd ruined our holiday which was a bit much.

I met up with her to discuss holiday plans, and it was fine at first but she kept picking at me, and making sarcastic comments like 'am I not enough for you/is my holiday not enough for you?' or 'do you even WANT to go on holiday with just me?' and 'sorry if my company isn't enough', etc, just very sarky and mean; I tried to explain I was just a bit down because of the situation generally (i.e lost my DP of 3 years?! we had seen him in town just before this too, so I was a bit knocked by it). She just got frustrated I wasn't outwardly excited, I guess. I started to get a bit upset and kept asking her not to do this because my 'mood' wasn't anything to do with her, kept saying I was excited I just felt a bit low. She then started with the 'and now you're upset because I'm such a terrible mother aren't I, everything's my fault, just like it always is with you' and started ranting about how no one treats her properly and all her daughters are awful, basically. It's what she is like. It doesn't matter what I say or how I counteract it. We didn't speak for a bit and then she brought up me moving house soon and said if I wanted her DP to help I would have to arrange it now. I said don't worry about it, I can sort it and she looked at me with absolute disgust and said don't be so patronising and don't speak to me like that. With her it's all just very twisted and odd. I don't know. So again I asked her not to be like this or I'd have to go because I couldn't deal with this and she said 'is this what you've become?'. So I did leave. I feel really horrible but I was on the brink of bursting into tears, and she is so cutting and unnecessarily mean.

She can be nice and okay to spend time with, but when this side comes out I can't deal with it, I especially couldn't in this situation.

I was so excited about this holiday, but a bit concerned because she does tend to be difficult sometimes seemingly at random. Seeing her and this unfolding just kind of confirms that. I would feel horrendously guilty if we didn't go though.

I just don't know what to do. If I go, no doubt we'll fall out on holiday, constant snipes about everything. If I don't go, she basically said I may as well torch our entire relationship. Things have been difficult between us what with her past alcoholism/EA as a child but I don't want to ruin our relationship forever (as tempting as that is sometimes). I want to go and give it a chance but I'm terrified and I won't be able to hold it together. I've been crying every day for the past fortnight about this shit situation and it's not getting any better.

WWYD?

OP posts:
Cricrichan · 03/06/2017 14:40

She sounds horrible and males everything about her. Any normal mum would be comforting their daughter if there dp had cheated on her. It also sounds like no matter what you do, nothing will make her happy. If you don't want to go, then don't go. She's going to moan anyway.

Cricrichan · 03/06/2017 14:41

Makes not males

Cricrichan · 03/06/2017 14:41

Their not there!

coconutcattery · 03/06/2017 14:53

To be fair before this happened, she has been quite comforting, has texted every few days asking how I am, and she made it clear she was really angry at him, she just has a very nasty selfish streak and i don't think the realises the way she speaks to people isn't okay. It's genuinely baffling. I feel awful but I can't deal with her speaking to me like that!

It's true, no matter what I say or do it doesn't pacify her when she's angry, she's just angry and it comes towards me. It's so shitty.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 03/06/2017 15:04

She is still an emotionally abusive alcoholic; her innate character has not altered here. Abusers are not nasty all the time but their nice/nasty cycle is a continuous one. She is being "supportive" currently just long enough to draw you back in and make you doubt your own self again.

I take it as given that none of your other siblings have any sort of relationship with her either now. Its hard being the last one left but you can walk away from her.

Its not your fault she is like this, these are her issues to own and not yours to carry. She is blaming you really for all her inherent ills; you probably remind her of your father, a man that she probably really hated. She has caused you to have FOG; fear, obligation and guilt re her.

I would not go on this holiday at all because your mother will likely make it all about her again or otherwise emotionally abuse you. I would also suggest you post on the "well we took you to Stately Homes" thread on these pages and read "Toxic Parents" written by Susan Forward.

Cornwallcornwall · 03/06/2017 15:47

Well its your well deserved holiday too, once you are off, you dont need be tpgether all the tome, GO it will give you time to think this all oit. Go Go Go!

Wishimaywishimight · 03/06/2017 16:20

She sounds very like my mother - snappy, sarcastic, offended by anything and everything. I accepted it for many years and actually only stood up for myself and telling her I would no longer tolerate the way she spoke to me when I was 40! We are now very low contact, I only ever see her in the company of others and only in public places. I just developed a total antipathy toward her. I would eat my own foot than go on holiday with her and her sniping.

It's such a difficult time for you right now, you need to be around kindly people. If you feel you can't cancel at this stage then perhaps you could set some boundaries when she starts bitching at you and tell her if she can't speak politely then you will be spending some days doing your own thing.

Aquamarine1029 · 03/06/2017 17:08

I wouldn't go because I think it's high time to stand up to your mother. Being nice "some of the time" Just doesn't cut it. She thinks she can get away with being a manipulative, horrible shrew when it suits her, and you're expected to stand there like her punching bag. Fuck that. Enough. You need to think about yourself and what you need right now. What you don't need is to go on "holiday" with someone who's going to make you miserable.

coconutcattery · 03/06/2017 17:58

Attila unfortunately actually my siblings do still see her, not that much and it's pretty strained but the relationship exists. The abuser side just never goes away, and I think I'm the only one that gets it now, because it only ever happens when it's just me and her and usually we meet up with all of us, or I would meet up with her with my ex there too. so if I cut ties I'd be the first of my family to do so... so it's really scary. But it's tempting. I feel so alone but I can't pretend it's a fulfilling relationship because it isn't.

Thanks for the answers so far- that's how I feel, I need to be around people who are going to make me feel better, and my mother just makes me feel panicked, whenever I'm with her I'm just counting down until it's over. I thought it'd be okay because my ex was supposed to coming too, obviously. I don't know if I can cope on my own in this state :(

Pretty depressing wondering how my life got to this but here we are.

OP posts:
CatsAndCandles · 03/06/2017 21:32

You're not torching your relationship. She is.

She sounds awful. I quite possibly wouldn't go but it really is up to you.

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