Hey
You sound so worn out, and unhappy. Sorry!!!!
And - it's totally understandable - house and kids are hard work.
I don't have any advice, only you can decide what you need ribbentrop happy.
But what i did want to say - many women around me feel down and tired - seems to be the phase right after the babies grow up a little bit and we come up for air.
Maybe - it is true and marriage is over. Or - maybe you are in a rut and both are exhausted?
Before you make choices that change your kids lives forever - is there anything else you can try?
You mentioned improved financial situation - so - will getting some domestic help help take some pressure off, for example?
Also - if the house is full of stuff - have you tried getting rid of some of it?
It is, somhow, cathartic - in the past few years - i have been on two major purges - kids stuff, my stuff. Bags and bags went to Oxfam - and it made me feel lighter, happier.
My H also works a lot and barely does anything with kids, because he thinks he needs his rest and doesn't feel like pushing himself to do much on weekends. Used to get me upset. And then i decided - his loss.
I take the kids and we go do things we like. He sees them when they are home.
For me - and i felt lukewarm for years - it's been important to realise that i am the only person responsible for my own happiness. Other people can't make me happy.
H included.