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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Oh bugger, the only man I ever loved has gone, and I'm single again,and it's mother's day...

11 replies

climbingrosie · 18/03/2007 17:08

Just feeling really low, my bf and I ended it yesterday, and I don't think it has quite hit me yet, all I can think about is the good times we shared and how I thought we'd grow old together .

Am feeling unloveable, like I'll never find anyone who will love me faults and all, and it's sooooo hard to meet people anyway as a single mum.
Oh god, I'm really single all over again, I feel so stupid for getting so close, for opening myself up, but I couldn't help it, he was actually lovely, he is lovely, that's what is so hard, nothing happened, neither of us did anything wrong or hurt the other one,we just started arguing, disagreeing on things, and seemed to view things differently, I think it al moved too fast, even though I was so careful not to rush things. The worst thing is that he is the only man I have ever actually loved in the true sense of the word, not just 'in love with' but actually just loved, warts and all, as a person, and I still do . I just got the feeling it hasn't been right in the last few weeks, I can't explain it really, but things were very strained and tense and we are both under a huge amount of pressure at work, and I was getting upset and feeling insecure, which I shouldn't be feeling in a relationship...

Oh well, I just have to get used to being alone in a bed every night all over again, only being hugged and kissed by my DS who's four, no one to chat to and laugh with and share my day with, no one to turn over and have sleepy hugs with in the morning, no one to make me feel special or worth anything or to give me a sense of identity as anything other than a mother .

Sorry for the ramble, I'm feeling all alone and lonely and terribly terribly sad, and it's mother's day, and I'm at my parents with my three beautiful sisters who are all in wonderful long term relationships ( and I love them dearly, don't get mewrong, I'mnot jealous, it's just hard), and I have to pretend I'm fine coz I think if I start I will not stop, the floodgates will open, I feel broken inside {sad] so broken.

OP posts:
wotzsaname · 18/03/2007 17:10

poor poor broken heart, it will get better.

bellarosa · 18/03/2007 20:20

(((((((((( Hugs))))))))) to you climbingrosie

climbingrosie · 18/03/2007 21:32

Thank you both!
I do need a hug

OP posts:
Fanko · 18/03/2007 21:37

just going through something similar myself and that's what i've found worst, the one time you really need that hug, and it's the absence of the one person you want it from that's caused the need

monika11 · 18/03/2007 21:38

couldnt you both just give a break instead of completely seperating?

climbingrosie · 19/03/2007 07:44

Oh fanko, that's exactly it. Sorry to hear you're going through a similar thing.

Monika11 this is what I first suggested but he said that would be too hard and nothing would change, I don't know, I am so confused as he is also really hurting and we had so many good times together and nothing majorly bad...I don't know. It's too late for that now I guess, whop knows what might happen in the future but I'm not going to entertain the possibility right now, it is too painful and I odn't want any false hope.

Thanks for your support all.

OP posts:
Fanko · 19/03/2007 08:08

glad my mumblings made sense to someone!

just take each day at a time, i'm trying not to hope but we are at least friends. if that's all we can be then i'll settle for that, just try to keep a 'whatever is right for us, will be' mindset x

climbingrosie · 19/03/2007 11:18

Thanks Fanko, I will try.

OP posts:
climbingrosie · 19/03/2007 11:20

I thougt of him as my best friend too, and he always told me I was his best friend, so I hope we will at least still have that.

OP posts:
Fanko · 19/03/2007 19:01

my ds' dad and me split years ago and we've managed to stay very good friends, i know i can always turn to him and vice versa. it can be done, just takes time. on the positive side, i went to see my ex boyf yesterday, he had his son for the weekend and my ds loves him! we had a great day, was odd not kissinga nd cuddling but he did give me a hug goodbye completely unprompted so that'll do me

Aloveheart · 19/03/2007 19:03

(((((hugs)))))))))) i'm so sorry that you've a broken heart i hope you feel better soon.

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