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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationship Advice

10 replies

court1989 · 31/05/2017 15:51

We have been together for about 4 years and then split for 5. We got back together 2 years ago. Still together. When me and my fiancé argue, it gets to the point of him always threatening to leave me high and dry and take our girls. I did let him talk me into quitting my job a year ago. That's about the time when these issues started. We argue a lot. He doesn't hear me out. When I try to talk to him during an argument to work things out he is always talking over me or says he doesn't want to hear it. Last night it was about sex. I definitely put out. He got it 2 days in a row and wanted it for the third day. I said I needed to rest and relax. Now its I never give it to him when he wants it. Only when I want it. Not true. I still give it to him whether I want it or not. But try to tell him other wise and he throws a fit. He's told me that I am wasting his time. Ive told him to leave since he is so unhappy and then he keeps asking me if I have found someone else. Which I haven't. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. Has anyone been in this situation and managed to work things out? I have 4 children and 2 of them are his. Sadly they overhear a lot of our arguments.

OP posts:
LucyLocketLostIt · 31/05/2017 15:53

That sounds really difficult.

Not sure what to advise but think I would look for another job in the meantime if I were you.

Why did he want you to quit it?

MikeUniformMike · 31/05/2017 15:55

This does not sound like a healthy relationship.

Shoxfordian · 31/05/2017 15:55

Definitely find another job

And then another man (ltb)

court1989 · 31/05/2017 15:57

I am a full time college student. He said he didn't want me to be so stressed out anymore. I was working full time and going to school full time. And then when I quit its like his whole attitude changed

OP posts:
OriginalArchitect · 31/05/2017 16:26

Not true. I still give it to him whether I want it or not.

I find the way you talk about sex, really worrying. "He got it two nights in a row". Why would he want to have sex with someone who by their own admission, doesnt want it? It doesnt sound like he values you very much...

He made you quit and then presumably became financially responsible for the family? He sounds controlling and unpleasant, I'd suggest you would be better off without him and his entitled, demanding prickish behaviour.

Adora10 · 31/05/2017 16:35

Just yuck, you put out, are you a prostitute, you don't owe him jack shit where your body is concerned OP.

I'd call it a day, it must be having a terrible effect on your children.

You can't have a relationship with someone who won't listen, compromise or see your point of view, you are simply wasting your time.

TheNaze73 · 31/05/2017 16:45

He's treating you as if he doesn't care about you. He's bulldozing you & using you as a cum dump.
You're worth so much more than that. Bin him off

court1989 · 31/05/2017 17:52

Thanks for yalls input and opinions. Ill be looking for a job within the week and getting myself set back up to take care of me and my own. I managed to finally get up with his mom and she didn't seem surprised by his behavior and told me all kinds of other things about him. It is having a terrible effect on my children and myself. I just want us (as in me and my kids) to be happy again. Its good to have an outsiders opinion on what is going on. Thank you

OP posts:
MyheartbelongstoG · 31/05/2017 18:55

My boyfriend never ever pesters me for sex.

Tell him to roll his own next time.

LucyLocketLostIt · 31/05/2017 18:58

You are a full time student plus have a full time job and you have four children?!!

How on earth do you have any time for anything?

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