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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Marriage talk tonight or not?

11 replies

Ludoole · 24/05/2017 18:37

On the first day of our holiday my fella asked me if I'd say yes if he asked me to marry him. I said when/if he asks properly he will get my answer. He kept pushing and i eventually told him that obviously I would. He then says we won't tell anyone until hes sorted the ring. That was ok by me.

Anyway today a tour guide asks if we are married and he says no and then adds that will never happen ShockShock.
Im more than a bit put out but have yet to discuss with him why he said that. His son and my 2 boys were around and we haven't said anything to them yet which is why I haven't bought the subject up with him.

Do i leave it let it fester until we get back home or should I talk to him about it tonight and hope it doesn't spoil the holiday?

OP posts:
Gazelda · 24/05/2017 18:39

I'd bring it up, but in a "I'm curious why you said that after our recent conversations" way rather than accusatory/I'm hurt etc.

Ludoole · 24/05/2017 18:41

I wouldn't be accusatory but he has a tendency to be defensive Hmm

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 24/05/2017 18:41

What a weird thing to say just after asking if you'd say yes if he proposed.

Just ask what he meant. Don't sit on it.

CheerfulCherry · 24/05/2017 18:42

Was he joking? Or did he seem like he meant it? I'd bring it up tonight but stay calm about it. You're not looking for an argument you'd like to know what he meant, that's all.

Ludoole · 24/05/2017 18:43

He laughed but i think that's what hurt most. He could have just said no!

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BurnTheBlackSuit · 24/05/2017 18:44

Is he doing that (stupid and annoying thing) of trying to put you off the scent so he can suprise you?

(Like Chandler in Friends)

expatinscotland · 24/05/2017 18:45

'I wouldn't be accusatory but he has a tendency to be defensive hmm'

Why do you want to marry someone like this? Sounds like a twonk.

Changedname3456 · 24/05/2017 19:00

You said "his son" was there - is he concerned about the reaction of his exDP/exW if she finds out via their son?

TheNaze73 · 24/05/2017 19:05

Why don't you ask him? Wait until after the football obviously, if he's that way inclined

Emboo19 · 24/05/2017 19:25

If the boys were there was he down playing it so they wouldn't guess. That's the type of thing my dad does and in doing so, makes it really obvious to everyone he's planning something.

Just ask him what he meant by it.

Ludoole · 24/05/2017 19:59

His son and I have a great relationship, as i do with his ex wife Smile.
I'll ask him tonight. Kids have disappeared on their own (teens) so I'll get some time.

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