Ok i've married to DH for 11 years... my hubby is eldest amongst his generation...but he is very much an introvert. his family on other hand are very mouthy... fair enuf... but from day one i noticed they didn't really respect my hubby... i too got very little or no respect... and after a while we were openly ridiculed at gettoghethers.... my mother in law who has since passed on was also subject of much ridicule which majority of the time came from my father in law and younger brother in law.
i now have two dd and we have moved out just before birth of first dd. i limit my daughters visiting inlaws to once a month although they live 15 minutes away. i never visit ... maybe every 3 mnths if it's someone birthday.
my father in law is quite fond of the girls and tries to see them quite often but i find myself making excuses. think it is because even to this day when they see me once in a while... i get a jibe about my mothering skills etc.
the way i look at it is if they cant respect my kids parents sooner or later they wud start to say things to my kids and which wud have an affect on their confidence. i feel this wud surely happen when my brother in law who is the golden child has his kid.
or i fear they wud turn my kids against me just like how my brother in law has not been taught to respect his late mother or elder brother... the in laws are quite rich so wud spare no expense in getting the girls gifts or taking them on holiday etc.
aibu to keep my kids contact to minimum with inlaws... i fear that because of me my kids won't get to know their family.