The way forward - sorry long post

[Mermaidinthesea123]

Now the initial shock of my impending divorce is over and I'm working through the practicalities I am wondering what the hell I'm going to do with the rest of my life.
I wasn't expecting to be husbandless in my mid fifties, I have no idea what I'm going to do in retirement, I don't particularly want another relationship and I'm certainly not going dating. I was looking forward to me and my husband retiring somewhere like Cornwall and setting up a couple of businesses part time but I haven't got the motivation to do that on my own.
After the menopause I'm no longer interested in a sexual realtionship and most of the men out there seem to be ageing lotharios who want to go mountain biking every weekend and date young women :-/
I was great looking when I was young but now I'm just middle aged and overweight. I could afford some "work" but it wouldn't change what is going on inside.
I'm lucky in that I have my own home (not paid for yet), a small pension and a job I love that pays the bills just fine.
I wasn't expecting to be here, now. I don't know whether to move, concentrate on work more, save up all my money to have my own business in retirement rather than work for someone else.
I'm just feeling rather hopeless at the moment.
I have great neighbours who are also friends but I just don't want to live here on my own forever doing the same things.
All the men I meet are hopeless, I don't fancy any of them so I've ended up with quite a few platonic male friends. I have good friends but they all have families so I can't constantly be over there.
I am completely and utterly locked into a hopeless fug and if I could just get my act together I'm sure I could have a good future.
Someone suggested it's too early to start making any plans, I should give post divorce at least a year before deciding what to do.
I don't know what to do to sort out my head.

Just enjoy doing what makes YOU happy. You're not living your life to please anyone else. I think you're in quite an enviable position! The world is at your feet and it's up to you write what happens in your next chapter! What hobbies do you have? Do you have children?
And please remember, happiness and contentment come from within... Have a look at mindfulness techniques.

Mermaid I could be you. I've been divorced 5 years and still single. Planning my retirement in 8 years and a little scared.

I think there is a need for a singles retired friendship group ..... you could start that as a business idea ..... I'd join

Thank you both, I think it's a lot easier to make friends when you're older.
We did whatever my husband wanted while I paid all the bills. I realise that I'm better of without him in the long run, i sacrificed everything I really wanted to do which I can do now.
I love gardening, visiting beautiful gardens and i have other esoteric interests that I practise with friends. I can finally do that bookbinding course I've always wanted to do.
I'm retirning in 11 years Rio, my retirement date is 67. It seems way too soon. i thought I might buy two flats, there are plenty of divided homes for sale around here, live in one and rent the other out for some retirement income later on.
I think your idea for a singles retired friendship group is a very good idea.
I'm sure there must be such things. Once the divorce is over i will probably have the impetus to go forward, the whole process is so exhausting

If you are still mid divorce then you are in transition so I think your feelings are to be expected.Just know you are moving forwards.Meetup is an excellent resource to join new groups.

Give yourself time, you may need to wallow for a while but you have lots of ideas so I think you will be fine.

So many people are in your situation, divorcing later in life so you are not alone.
You have a job, friends, hobbies so it's maybe just a low phase that you will come through.
I don't think all men are hopeless but I think there is an issue for women around 40s & 50s as we don't tolerate behaviours our mothers generation did, as thankfully we have choices.Men of this age however were raised by that generation so some may not have caught up.
Just be open go new experiences (which you sound like you are) and good will come from it.

I'm also over 50, and going through similar. I have started a new career path, or rather restarted. I have done one university level course, and looking for further study in September. The world is your oyster, you are never too old. Without the constraints of having to accommodate a selfish manchild, you can do whatever you want. Whatever your original plans, readjust them, go for it. Xxxx