Help me please - I ended it

[MozzchopsThirty]

And it's starting to hurt

He's messaged me all week, some nice, some sarcastic.
Then I decided to phone him last night
He said it's nothing we can't sort out
That he just needs time until his divorce is done.
Says he knows me not meeting his children was a mistake

He was genuinely shocked when I brought up the whole 'well I've spent £87 on you so you need to spend £87 on me'

He wants to get back together and make it work
I said I've wasted 3 years, and he said all this last time I ended things and nothing's changed in those 8 months

Can I have some girl power pls

You've ended it. Time to block him on your phone and all social media.

I don't have him on any social media

if the relationship isn't right in the first place you can't 'make it work'.

When it was good it was amazing
When it was bad it was hideous

Everything was perfect for the first year until he ended it
We got back together but he broke my heart and I'm not sure I ever recovered from that

I'd just like some reassurance that things actually wouldn't change if I gave him another chance

Why would they change? After 3 years you pretty much know the score.

Why do you think he's clinging on, how did he benefit from your relationship?

Unfortunately you can't make it work.

It either does or it doesn't. .
And it didn't. .
Move on and leave him to his ex and dc.

Your feelings were never a priority.

So he trampled on them again and again.

And will continue to do so for as long as you allow it.

What actually happend?

Do you think speaking to him has increased the hurt you are feeling - and increased your doubt about the decision you made to end it?

Do you think he can change from the man you know him to be (for 3 years) to becoming the man of your dreams just because you have 'threatened' to end it?

He is who he is - his behaviour may change short term because you have said its ended - but it wont be sustainable because he is a man who gives you 'hideous' times. That's not love.

Please continue to respect and love yourself (because he can't) and move on.

Keep remembering the hideous times, write them down.I don't know the back story but if after 3 years you didn't meet his children then it would not get better.

He doesn't seem capable of being a team, more an individual.It would always been the same.

Yes that's always happened in previous break ups with him, he turns into the perfect man for 2-3 months then it's back to normal.

I think you're right he is very much a loner, keeping everything separate, his family, his kids, his work

There is a
'Had a titful' thread in relationships with a bit of back story from a couple of weeks ago

The thing is 3+3 is never going to make ten is it?

I know it hurts but it sounds like it's for the best.

If you get back you will be going round in circles just find your self worth and understand that you deserve better.

Leave him in the past where he belongs