Friend pushed/pinched & poked dd!

[bellarosa]

Yesterday i went to lunch with dd1's godmother.
DD1 is a bit of a scallyway but nothing exceptional for a 25mnth old. She was eating her food rather messily and spat some out onto the carpet. Godmum then picked it up and shoved it into dd's mouth really hard!
Later dd was trying to get godmum's attention and was pulling on her clothes a bit and godmum shoved her really hard so that she fell over abd bumped her head on the table!
Then later dd was looking at godmums earrings and accidentally pulled it abit hard and godmum poked her in the eye!

I was so shocked by what she was doing, she seemed to think it was perfectly ok to do that to my daughter!
I was very embarrised by it and as she is one of my closest friends didnt really know how to handle it.

I probably should have said something at the time but was so dumbfounded.
God mum doesnt have any kids, but she is generally very good with them and loving.

Feeling very angry about it and dont know how to approach god mum about it.

what would you do/ advise?!

yes, i think you are all right, i will not be leaving the dd's with her again, not until i can completly trust her, if ever.

feel very sad as i know this will really taint the way i feel about her forever.

i know what you mean colditz, lulu is lovely isnt she !

txt from her: dont know what your on about?!

havent read whole thread - how old is godmum? could she be going senile?

thanks colditz.....

reply

YOu poked my daughter in the eye. You pushed her so hard she fell and hit her head. You forced food from the floor into her mouth. THAT is what I am talking about.

thanks bella too !

ok..she is on the denial / guilt thing...

do you feel this would be better done talking, or are you better texting

a response of

'poking DD in the eye, shoving food in her mouth, shoving her so she banged her head...or have you forgotten what you did? because neither i nor dd has ...'

would suffice

Agree with colditz's reply (and lulumama's is about the same).

Well done for starting the conversation.

If you can stand it, i think I'd (personally) try not to have the conversation by text - either f2f (if you're brave enough!) or write her a letter - ime there's too much potential for things to be misread in texts and this is going to be a pretty emotional conversation!!

Good luck - you are so in the right on this one it ain't true!

Drugs?

Ah - therein lies the problem !!! She hasn't got a f***g clue how to treat children !!

Bye bye godmum !

off to bed now, bella..hope you get some resolution...sleep well, you have done the absolute right thing for your dd x

no she's not got dementia! lol! she's 28!

She nmight have brain damage though - after you go and see her !!! Ha ha ha !!!

yes i'm going to continue conversation in person not via txt as far too much could be misinterpreted.
gotta go bub woken up!

How did you get on LMB?

Hope things ok.

Message withdrawn

...i cant believe you didnt do anything when she did it!..not slating you tho you were obv shocked but that is waaaaay over the mark..she needs to be brought to reality and im afraid to say id have either verbally or phsically give her hell myself for that and im not a violent person.

i would tell her exactly what you think of her and her behaviour, past and present then tell her to crawl back under her rock!!