Are all affairs bad?

[BadBetty]

Hi all!
I'm new to this but wanted to hear some opinions.
I'm trapped in an unhappy marriage, my husband barely notices me and he is complacent, lazy and selfish. I want to leave him but our daughter has started her GCSES and I'd never forgive myself if the disruption of a divorce impacted on her.
He is a good dad and he is a good person in lots of ways, she would be devastated if we broke up.
He seems to think our relationship is fine and I've tried talking to him but he just sits playing on his phone constantly and ignoring me. I feel lonely and trapped I don't want to be with him anymore. I have got the chance to spend time with another man, I'm seriously tempted... would it be so wrong to have a little bit of fun back in my life. I can't help but feel seeing another guy would tide me over until my daughter finishes school and then I can leave my husband. I miss sex, I miss being held and kissed. I miss being noticed.

Th economy time I saw an affair being a good thing is the one a very good friend of mine had.
She was in an absive relationship (her then H sent her to hospital a few times...) and she was convinced she was worth nothing and no one would ever want her.
Then come a work trip and this amazing guy who tells her she is beautiful. They are starting an affair (they were obviously living far from each other), he says he is ready to move to be with her etc....
She refused (mainly because he had dcs on his own and she didn't want the dcs to be negatively affected by their relationship, which it would have been if he had moved).
What it did though is to raise her self esteem a hell of LOT, she found the courage to leave and to tell her H to fuck off.
She found the courage to tell everyone WHY she had left too (incl in our close knit friendship group)
She started a new life for herself and is now happily married.

So whilst I can see that your marriage is not a happy one, that communication is not great, i think you need to make a decision for yourself.
If you are deciding that there is no way you will divorce atm because of the siruption to your dd, then do so and ensure that you can find some happiness in things you do (wo relying or expecting your DH to be part of it). Build a life for yourself as YOU rather than you as a part of couple. But don't have an affair!! Its only going to lead to some very hurt feelings (you incl!). You will get hurt because affairs are never 'easy', I expect you will feel guilty plus the stress of ensuring you aren't found out etc...
Think too of what your dd will think of you if she knows :(
And of course that wo talking about how your DH would feel and the betrayal etc...

I understand the loneliness and temptation but an affair is always bad.