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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH constantly criticizing me

26 replies

PlinkPlonkPlunk · 21/03/2017 12:55

DH has always been quite a critical person, but it's starting to get me down. It feels like every time i do anything, he finds something wrong with it. For example, i tidied the shed - this had needed to be done for ages, but neither of us had had time. Took quite a while, but i was able to clear lots of space and put things in more sensible places. Told DH what is fine, expecting him to be pleased. His response was "where did you put X?" (X had previously been hidden behind 2 bikes, and awkward to get to). Me: on the shelf. DH: "Oh, no, i don't want it there, that'll be hard to reach". After all the time I'd taken, i was gutted that he could only find fault. Similarly, i bought a new plant pot for the front garden, filled out with flowers, and set it on the paving. He came home, looked at it, and immediately said "that'll have to move; it'll mark the paving". Again, I'd been quite pleased with my efforts - i suffer from severe depression, so doing anything like that is quite an effort for me. I'd wanted flowers in the garden to cheer me up a bit. Now I'm going to have to move them round the side of the house where i wont be able to see them. I know these sound like small example, but i think that's the issue - everything i do seems to get criticised. I find it hard enough to motivate myself to do anything round the house, but it's even harder when i know I'll probably be criticized for anything i attempt. In other ways, DH is great; he's very supportive practically, doing extra housework when i can't etc. But this is really getting me down. Am i being too sensitive and if so, how can i stop?

OP posts:
Adora10 · 21/03/2017 17:43

Really feel for you poor ladies; constant put down and criticism is massive and makes you feel crap; it shouldn't even exist in a normal healthy happy relationship.

Try really making them listen and say you are not there to be used as verbal punch bag and how much it hurts your feelings; if that doesn't work, I'd give up and remove myself from the negativity, permanently.

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