Husband won't let me divorce

[rockhardplace78]

I'm a regular poster but have name changed. Been married for 4 years. 2 kids. I don't want to be married to him anymore. He said if I filed for divorce, he would contest it and cause so many problems that I would give up on divorcing him. He's well off and obsessed with me not getting anything financially. He said he'd ignore all solicitor's letters. The house is in his name, he pays all the bills and mortgage. 2/3 of childcare. He said he has no intention of continuing to do this if we split, so I would be financially destitute. I can't afford a solicitor at the moment, in saving up for an initial appointment but in the meantime, I'm going mad. Can anyone offer any advice?

Please leave him soon and contact Women's Aid. I would take him to the cleaners just for being an abusive arse.

You need to see a solicitor. Don't mess about with free half hour appointments, they aren't designed to enable you to get proper advice.

You also need to register your home rights against the property. It's free, and quite straight forward.

It's impossible to give you any sensible idea of outcome without a lot more information.

Just for yourself, record your conversations with him then transcribe them for yourself. You then have an accurate record of exactly what he has said and when and you can prove it if you ever have to. Courts won't usually like using a recording made without the person concerned being aware but you will have proof that could be submitted to his solicitor when he lies and says you are making things up.

It sounds to me like your OH is only with you to save losing part of his fortune.

So hit him where it hurts, right in the pocket.

I hope you know he can't stop you from divorcing him. he can block and interfere with financial support but you don't need his permission to divorce.
not that this is ideal but if necessary: from the government web site
You have lived apart for at least 5 years
You can apply for a divorce if you’ve lived apart for at least 5 years, even if your husband or wife disagrees.

He’s off his box!

He can’t atop you divorcing him. It may take two years, but after then it has to go through

He has to pay child maintenance for his kids, regardless if he wants to or not

You don’t have to prove unreasonable behaviour. It’s about what's unreasonable to you. You could say that him picking his toe nails is unreasonable, and that would be enough of a reason

All the marital assets, pensions houses etc regardless of who’s name they are in, are taken into consideration. If you are the primary Carer for your dc it’s likely you’ll get the lions share of the assets

Get yourself off for a free half hour at a solicitor and discuss this. You maybe able to use a solicitor and they take their fee one extra you have a settlement (hence you’ll be able to pay them then)

Oh and don’t believe a word he says. He’s talking out his arse

"WhoKnewBeefStew*
On looking at the UK Gov website it doesn't appear that a divorce has to go through after 2 years.
If you are separated and one party doesn't wish to divorce then you have to wait for 5 years.

I seem to remember last year there was a case that was highly publicised on TV where a lady had to wait 5 years as her husband refused to divorce and they lived virtually next door to each other out in the sticks.

He is wrong. He doesn't get a choice if you choose to divorce him. If you divorce he doesn't get a choice about paying towards his dcs. He doesn't get a choice about what is counted as unreasonable behaviour. That is the law.

A lot of the behaviour you have described here could well be classed as unreasonable (e.g. 1.telling you he plans to live with you but ignore you. 2. Threatening that if you try to divorce he will make your life impossible and leave you destitute).

You don't have to prove unreasonable behaviour. You just write it down.

Zombie from years ago!