3 weeks ago my uncle (who was suffering from terminal illness) died. It was a pretty sudden and traumatic death which, even though everyone knew it was coming shocked us all.
Anyway needless to say my mum talked about it pretty much non stop before and after it happened but not the usual stuff when someone dies...more going on about his kids who never bothered with him, slagging various people off, saying about how horrible my uncle had been in the past (but ended with "but he didnt deserve that" etc...). I obviously lent an ear assuming she needed someone to talk to.
Anyway it was his funeral last week, she was pretty cut up as was the rest of the family but before it even started she followed me into the toilets at the chapel and started going on about how disgusting his kids were (they're both in their 20's) for ignoring the family and how ridiculous my aunts son is for not acknowledging anyone etc etc...
Anyway the funeral started and finished, everyone was upset obviously and afterwards we all met in a local pub for a drink to my uncle, my mum then started going on about his kids again, going over to grandma asking if she'd noticed that they'd ignored everyone (my grandma clealy not interested in petty arguments on the day she's burying her son) and when she got no reaction there she went and mentioned it to my grandad and then to my aunt etc etc...
Anyway this was last week and she's gone on and on about my uncle, how he died (pretty gruesom and not something I want to re-live in detail every day), his kids, the current rows etc etc...but it's EVERYTIME I talk to her, she phones me and goes on about it all, if I phone her she swings the conversation around to it...even when I rand her up to tell her that my son had been taken to A&E with a head injury from school she still turned the conversation around to my uncle!
I know she's looking for someone to talk to and I'm very sad about it all too obviously but I am getting sick of hearing it day in and day out, especially the bits about what a sod he used to be, how bad he'd been to everyone but we still loved him etc etc etc...
I know this must sound so heartless...
Thing is my son has an achievement assembly tomorow, I have invited my mum and my grandma to come and watch. My mum usually comes to these things and I thought my grandma might enjoy a day out away from all the hassle at home...
I'm just now worried that mum will go on and on again all day, my grandma is blatently close to snapping at her, I'm getting irritable about it but how do I stop her without sounding heartless?
Everyone else is trying to get over the funeral etc and get on with their lives but my mum constantly forces them to think about it all whenever she talks to them. To make it even more annoying she usually ends it with "anyway it's best not to go on about it..." when she's the only one doing so!
please help