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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Family member with manipulative lying con man

5 replies

jdoe8 · 10/03/2017 10:57

But said family member is besotted with him. Its a list of tall tale after tall tale that said family member seems to swallow. This family member was previously very good with money but has now signed up to several credit cards and maxed them out and is now asking other members of the family for money. Apparently then con man has the money but he just can't access it at the moment.

It's bull and many of the things he has said we've proved to be lies by doing some re-search but she won't see any common sense. She's not very street smart and is very trustworthy.

Any advise would very much be welcome Sad

OP posts:
AddHock · 10/03/2017 15:42

I can understand how frustrated you must be feeling, because I too have a relative who is refusing to face reality, and there appears to be nothing anyone can say to persuade her otherwise.

It is a sad and difficult situation, and I think all we can do is step back and allow them to make their own choices after making it clear we will still be 'there' for them with our support should they ever need it.

Littlejayx · 10/03/2017 16:02

My mum is in this exact situation!

met a man online shortly after divorce, moved in within 2 months (Due to mix up of contracts at his flatshare apparently) No job, no money, no car or family.

Just as my grandparents fell ill this man proposed to her and married her just after they died. now he is spending all of their hard earned money on alcohol and now selling our family home and buying a boat. While my mother works full time to cover the bills.

I have been exactly like you and outted this man as a liar and this has only pushed my mother away. I'm scared when it all goes wrong she will have nobody. The only thing I can do is help pick up the pieces when it all goes wrong unfortunately.

Bananalanacake · 10/03/2017 17:05

Have they actually met? as the 'can't access money at the moment' excuse sounds like one conducted over the internet without meeting.

highinthesky · 10/03/2017 17:09

It's incredibly difficult in this situation - I'm in similar and have learned the very hard way that I'll never be thanked for trying to help. Make your position clear, and be there when it goes tits up.

jdoe8 · 12/03/2017 08:53

So sorry that others are going through the same. I've thought the only thing I can do is nothing until they ask for help, but its so hard and what if they never see sense?

Yes they've met, been together 2 years. Although the partner is now in prison.

It's so hard doing nothing :( she has no idea the stress she is giving the entire family, espcially my parents who are in their 70s and as they have so much time on their hands they are being badly affected by it all.

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