I'm broody hubby isn't.

[Mrsb2010]

I'm new to all this and didn't know where to post but considering my story I thought this was as good a place as any.

So after having our dd (3) I had undiagnosed PND that snowballed into full on depression. DD was very clingy, had attachment anxiety and still won't sleep all night in her own bed. We also have a DD(6) who is a little superstar and helps out anyway he can.
My depression got so bad that I convinced myself that my hubby was only here because of our children and didn't actually love me. I felt awful about my weight and looks and made the mistake of being unfaithful to my DH, all because someone paid me the attention my husband wasn't. It all came out and my hubby and I have decided to make our marriage work. This happened in Sept last year and since then we have a new sense of honesty and understanding in our marriage. I'm now receiving counselling and taking AD and feel that my head is clear for the first time in forever.
The only problem I have now is that I'm desperately broody even though I was convinced I wouldn't want anymore. My DH has said point blankly no and that although that could change he doesn't seem to think it will. I ache all day every day and have even gotten to the point of tears when seeing babies/pregnant women while out.

I don't want to keep bringing it up in front of DH because he makes me feel guilty i.e he says he feels bad because he can't give me what I want etc. But I am starting to resent him as he seems so uncaring about how I feel. Am I just being selfish?

"But I am starting to resent him as he seems so uncaring about how I feel."

Can you not see the irony in this? You don't seem to care about how he feels either.

You seem to be excusing your affair on your situation and MH.

Having DC3 would not, in your circumstances, seem sensible, and your H is fully entitled to not want to. The wishes of partner who doesn't want another DC come first IMO.

Your choices seem to be stay with him, or leave to seek a new relationship.

What do you want him to do?!
You cheated on him 6 months ago.
He's already told you how he feels - it's a no now, and he doesn't know if it's a no full stop.
How is he supposed to know?

You need to focus on your marriage now.

If he is uncaring then address that and potentially leave.

I'm sorry this isn't going the way you feel you deserve: support.
It's really hard to give support on what you feel you need in your life because he isn't being unreasonable in saying no.
You have a lot of work still to achieve with your marriage to ensure it survives the tough journey of parenting. You had a very bad experience with depression and the fall out, and a baby is not the way to put things right. The broody feelings you have are likely hormonal and will pass, fade in time. Most of us women have been there ourselves and know how it can feel, and it feels painful.
But you have caused your husband deep intense pain also. You aren't the only person who carries pain and anguish. He's also had to watch you with PND and support you and his DC through this really tough time.
This will drive you apart if you allow the resentment to take hold.
I suspect deep down that you need to possibly look at whether you are trying to feed an emotional chasm. Babies and affairs fill a deep pit of need that perhaps your husband and DC can never quite fill, you need more, your emotional hunger drives you rather than your rational mind which is why you make choices based on emotion (heart vs head).
The heart isn't always correct, and it's reasonable for your husband to not want to risk the strain of another child on your fragile marriage and mental health.
Give him some credit, or perhaps this marriage isn't right for either of you

Well op, would you have a baby with someone that had SEXUAL CONTACT. Nothing to shout about.

I mean, it was only sexual contact wasn't it.