Help

[user1488726663]

Hi basically I've been allowed to fall for a man who has a gf ...started off harmless then flirting and drunken texts ...now I feel like an idiot and I'm hurting because he allowed me to fall for him and before you judge me I can't help my feelings ..nothing has ever happened physically as I'm not that kind of person ..I don't know what to do

Ok. Here's my tuppence worth. Delete and block him. Do not have any further contact with him. No reasons, explanations, nothing.
Then every time you think of him, tell yourself to park it until your designated thinking time, which should be a set 15 minutes per day every day until it becomes a massive pita to set aside those 15 minutes.
Every time, every thought, think ok not now, it has to wait for thinking time and deliberately turn your mind to something else. It will be hard at first but you can do it, even if you have to turn your mind to something else by 'narrating' what you're doing or seeing.
It'll get easier.
Or you could just see hom for the lying cheating shite that he is and get angry. How fucking dare he!

You have two threads about this

How can you fall in love with someone who you've just flirted with? Are you a teenager?

I'm sorry you are getting a load of negative shit on here.

If it was me I would think I dodged a bullet. Clearly he is a bit of a player and yes he played you a bit but actually you took control and blocked him when you found out the truth. So, stick two fingers up at him, you deserve better x

I don't understand why some posters are being so nasty. You didn't flirt with him knowing he had a GF and you've been hurt through no fault of your own. As Jeaux90 says, you dodged a bullet. At least it didn't develop into anything further. You can cut him out of your life and move on now.

OP it sounds like you have already done the right thing by ignoring him. Stick to it. He has treated both you and the girlfriend badly. He does not deserve to have you feeling sad.

I mean this kindly, maybe think about why you've fallen hard for someone you can't have really known so well. That might help you with future potential relationships.

But maybe you were just unlucky and there's nothing to learn.

You are not an idiot. You were misled. I had a full on relationship with a married man (20 years ago, I'm feeling old!). I genuinely had no idea, I swallowed a lot of stupid stories and lies. Now that was stupid!

You have indeed dodged a bullet.