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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dating

11 replies

Zoila15 · 04/03/2017 15:54

Hi ladies! Please help! Need advice! I have met a really nice guy online. He has asked me out for drinks twice and we hit if off straight away chatting and laughing non stop. He tried to kiss me at the end of the first date but I turned my check to him and it was just like a friends kiss. He then asked me out for dinner. It was our third date. I had a really good time with him. When it was time to say goodbye, he walked me to my car and tried to kiss me again. I stupidly avoided the kiss again (even though I wanted to kiss him badly). Stupid I know and I can't explain why I did it. I messaged him later on, thanked him for the date and told him that I had a good time with him. He responded by saying that it was nice of me to say these kind of things but sometimes actions speak louder than words. Obviously he was referring to our third date and my "unwillingless" to kiss him. I really like him and wish I could go back in time. I know I screwed up. What do you think I should do? Thanks in advance.

OP posts:
noego · 04/03/2017 16:10

Go on fourth date and if you feel its right then return the kiss. Duh!!

AndImAnElf · 04/03/2017 16:12

Be open and say "I don't know why I didn't kiss you the other day. I've been thinking about you kissing me ever since...."

Zoila15 · 04/03/2017 16:55

Thank you. Do you think I should initiate the forth date? I am not sure if he is going to ask me out again. Or is it too needy? Sorry for all these questions. I was married for 12 years and got divorced 3 years ago so haven't dating anyone for ages.

OP posts:
noego · 04/03/2017 17:13

Initiate 4th date is not being seen as needy. You like his company don't you? You get along? Go for it.

Dieu · 04/03/2017 17:19

Hi. I think you should definitely instigate the next date, as if you continue to be passive, you will probably lose him anyway.
You need to show him that you're interested, as I would have given up with someone who didn't respond to a kiss by date 3.
Hope it all works out!

jeaux90 · 04/03/2017 17:25

Oh god ask him out yes! Dont play by the stupid old rules about men should ask and initiate! Show you are interested.

Zoila15 · 04/03/2017 23:12

Thank you so much for all your kind advice!! You made me feel so much better! I messaged him and told him that I liked him and that I didn't know why I didn't kiss him the other day. He responded straight away and asked me out on the forth date! Thanks a lot again!!

OP posts:
AndImAnElf · 04/03/2017 23:14

Woop! Have fun on your next date! Wink

Zoila15 · 05/03/2017 06:59

Thank you Smile

OP posts:
Belle89 · 05/03/2017 07:03

Fingers crossed, I always hold back and never rush through fear of them being after one thing. Daft I know. He sounds keen and thoughtful

tatshark · 13/03/2017 09:10

Don't speed things up! Once I met a guy on uk.cupid.com/ who seemed to need 5 dates to give me a kiss on the cheeck. Then 3 more dates for kiss on lips:) He was very shy indeed. Now he is not anymore. We got married last year. Guys sometimes need more time, let's not press them:)

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