Women don't make good leaders....

[BantyCustards]

...because the Egyptian empire fell under Cleopatra's rule.

Help me respond to this - it's been bugging me for weeks now. I'm not very good at 'arguing' with someone - have been conditioned to keep my mouth shut or suffer the consequences over the years.

This little gem has come from a man I've been dating for several weeks now and all in all he seems to tick all the boxes but this comment - I just can't let it go and want to discuss it with him.

I think the underlying problem is that real balanced history is absent from our schools.

Wars and inventions on their own are not a balanced view of history and it's made worse when no one is taught why women were excluded from those areas in the first place because the array of legal and social sanctions in place is breathtaking. It's a wonder any woman made it through to lead anything.

Ps and the man im dating now (well only 3 so far) he is the total opposite. I scrolled down his fb page because it was interesting and he has some feminist posts. The guy i stopped seeing laughed at me and told me there were no feminist men. I said there are more feminist men than there are happy hookers so maybe the best contender win the race. Less than a week later i went on a date with a man who understands.

Pfff Offred like that matters.

Only positive parts of your history can be retained if you have a penis, they both start with a p, so it's obvious. Vagina = vituperate.

Offred I feel aggrieved on your behalf and will endeavour to read up on her!

I'd tell him he's being a simplistic tart. An uneducated, sexist, misogynistic simplistic tart.
And I'd LTB!

Either he's trying to annoy you deliberately, in which case he's not very nice. Or he really believes that, in which case he's thick and also sexist. All of these characteristics would be grounds for dismissal I think.

Two words.

Donald. Trump.

Or four words.

Donald. Trump. Fuck. Off.

Or, depending on whether you can be arsed:

Donald Trump Adolf Hitler Josef Stalin Chairman Mao Pol Pot Slobodan Milosevic Idi Amin Augustus Pinochet Benito Mussolini this list of leaders responsible for the worst genocides ever committed not one of whom is a woman. And then Fuck Off.

Suggest he reads a history book or two, presuming he can read? Or even a quick goggle on the down fall of ancient Egyptian civilisation.
Of course he has a point, seen as all other ancient civilisations are still going strong.....who was ruling the Roman Empire when that fell, or the Mayans, Aztec's. I'm guessing they must have all had female leaders.

OP, you realise if you bring this up with him now, he's likely to laugh you off for hanging onto it for so long and come out with more sexist claptrap like, "Wow, you women sure know how to hold a grudge!"

That might be a good indicator for you to dump his arse

All the more reason for me to bring it up now, Turnip.

I ignored the red flags with my ex partner and paid dearly for it - I'm not ignoring shit like this with a new one.

might tell him that he's just never going to stimulate you intellectually and you see no future together.

^ this.

He sounds like a nob and doesn't deserve an answer.

I am at this !!
What an idiot. Let us know how your conversation with him goes, op!!

I was going to also name Elizabeth II and Victoria like DadSussex.

I'm sure I read that the most peaceful and prosperous times the UK ever had were under those queens.

Elizabeth I cleared up quite a bit of the mess and poverty her self involved father created too if I recall.

Plus the ONLY Icelandic bank that didn't take risks to cause the financial crash was run by women.

As others have said - he uses one single example of Cleopatra (oh and Egypt fell due 100% to her (lack of leadership), no other factors, at all. Right.

He ignores examples of Elizabeth I, Victoria who 'lead' at the times of their nation's greatest prosperity and dominance.

A very wide, well balanced argument.

Also most of the UK's political parties are currently being led by females, as are many countries around the world.

Has he compiled a thesis bases on a wide cross-section of female leaders in history and currently and come to a balanced, rational conclusion? I'm guessing that's a no.

The main issue is that he's deeply sexist (poss. misogynistic) and bases theores/opinions on random, individual examples (if even correct in Cleopatra's case) to 'confirm' his prejudices. It seems like it would be difficult to have a decent relationship with a man like that.

Honestly, why bother? He's either sexist or stupid and either way you won't be able to change that. Just dump him for not being your intellectual equal.

It's not even correct in Cleopatra's case (unless one takes a very simplistic view): I'm no historian but a quick jaunt through a few books told me that Egypt had been suffering problems for quite some time before she came on the scene.

Regarding Queen V. I'm afraid I do not see her as successful unless one measures success by the domination and subjugation and basic stripping of other countries assets. But I digress.

Since I'm once again back in the dating game I thought I'd share the bollocks I hear from men who think they are an authority: I'm twittering. If anyone wants to follow/join in I'll happily pass on my dating twitter account name.

This is all.

That's utterly depressing, Offred

Honestly, why bother? He's either sexist or stupid and either way you won't be able to change that

∆∆∆∆∆∆ this is spades.

Op any chance he was joshing? TBH it's the sort of thing I would say for a joke, if I was being a GF, to provoke a debate.

Oh no, I'm pretty sure he was serious.

He's been incredibly good to me in many other ways and has said things I simply haven't experienced from men in general such as being very mindful of my children, their feelings and wanting to make sure that they are ok with things (i.e. taking things slowly) but I just cannot let this go...obviously I'm not just being pedantic/difficult/awkward etc etc

I think you've fallen into the classic mistake of the post-abuse relationship. Just because it's not 'as bad' doesn't mean it's good. Being mindful of your children's feelings isn't a bonus, that's the minimum you should be expecting. On the other hand, you've only been dating a few weeks so I'm not sure what your dc have got to do with anything.

Good point, Trib.

The children have very little to do with it right now - he just brought it up in conversation that he was mindful that if things professed it wasn't just my feelings that counted, but you're right - my bar is probably THAT low that anything above it seems like a bonus.

When you consider my ex partner brought my estranged parents into our children's life without even letting me know and then tried to use my reaction of stopping contact until I could get a court order to stop my parents having contact I guess pretty much anything looks like a bonus.

The back-hander from me would have been...
"Women don't make good leaders of men like you..."