Husband got drunk, passed out and left laptop open I picked it up to use it in the morning and was blasted with images of porn. I checked the browsing history for that night and found about 12 sites with schoolgirls being naughty, and group sex and girl on girl sex. Nothing violent but but we do have teenage girls ( and boys) together.
I am strongly opposed to porn, I know there are lots of views but I have always been clear on mine to him. I think it is bad for men to watch. The think is, it may have been going on for many years as we had computer virus over the years that were porn related. I questioned whether it was the teenage boys but did ask him and he said of course not. I did find in spam once some emails that were porn related and the titled seemed very similar to what was on the site I found. Over the years, say the last 8 or so I found him increasing making sexist remarks that were out of character for him and commenting on women in terms of their attractiveness. Our own sex life, especially in the last year, dropped to almost nil. He seemed to have no interest. N
The marriage has always been a challenge but we worked on it hard but he is controlling and difficult at times. He often criticized me for watching " trashy shows" like the reality TV stuff. The word hypocrite comes to mind. I can't come back from this.
As a 50 + menopausal women, my self esteem is in the toilet. Just before xmas my mom had a massive stroke. In a few short months I have lost both my mom and my husband as sources of support. I haven't told my sisters or friends anything as I am so embarrassed. I don't see how the marriage can continue and, quite honestly, I don't think he could care less. I feel like I am living a bad reality TV show right now.