I think I want to gently sack this friend

[winkywinkola]

So I have this friend who claims to be a good friend. She has been there when I've had a few things going on but I sometimes wonder if it's for gossip or thrill value.

Whenever we are out with other friends, she doesn't engage in any conversation with me. If we are a three, she will only make eye contact with the other person, talk to them, look at me rarely to perform the basic social function of inclusion.

Trouble is, everyone else seems to prefer her company to mine. So they will not look at me either, engage only with her etc. I find it embarrassing because it's so blatant. And everyone else's preference for her is so obvious too. No effort to hide it.

I find it very odd. It's like she's trying to compete with me. To show me she's more popular and socially desirable. She totally is. it's weird. But because our dds are at the same school, there are many social situations that we are put together.

Plus we have this evening out with two other mothers at the school that has been going on for years. I want to not go anymore but it will cause drama and issues and questions.

I can't bothered with it because I always feel inadequate and weird after a social occasion.

Please can I have some advice as to how to deal with this?

From experience, some people are just more charismatic, people pleasers. I have a friend like this and when I bring her along to meet other friends, a similar situation occurs. I'd say try not to take it too personally, although difficult to do, some people just naturally attract more attention

I can see that people are naturally more charismatic. All fine.

It's the rudeness I can't bear.

This sounds rubbish, winky

I hope you are able to distance yourself with the least amount of bother. It is plain rudeness.

Just do what you are meant to do. Pick up and drop of your children

Do it!

No explanation. Nothing will confuse her more. She competes with you because she suspects that despite her success socially, you are the one who doesn't need the validation. So, no show down, no challenging her. Just tell her ............ you're going out with a friend shes never met next time.##

If she is like my old friend she'll work hard at quickly becoming a better friend to all of your friendly acquaintances.