I think after years of being told everything is my fault I've lost any sense of perspective. If I list H's behaviour could anyone point me in the direction of what to read up on online? Not that I realistically have any hope of changing his behaviour, we've agreed to separate, but would be interested if this is a pattern.
Made an effort socially in the early days, was generous, kind, good to be around
Bought a house together, all still fine
He didn't want children but then said he would rather do that than lose me
Pretty unsupportive during (twin) pregnancy. Loves the children dearly and them him but strict with them.
After the honeymoon days passed and I started to occasionally have a different opinion his temper became apparent - he's unable to control himself, at the slightest perceived criticism he shouts, swears, has on the odd occasion broken something, then storms out saying we need to divorce. This doesn't happen often as I know not to voice my opinion, sigh etc
He hates any social occasion meaning I feel very uncomfortable if we have people over or are invited out
Every Christmas or special occasion results in an argument, he says because I am stressed but I've come to realise it's him that stresses me, I loved socialising in the old days
He doesn't want to do anything at weekends apart from watch tv
Things have got worse since I've returned to work part time
When it's just everyday life it's fine, as long as I don't try and talk about something, tell him how I'm feeling, have a house full of people. However he can put on a good show and others don't realise what he's like.
What would you call this wise mumsnetters, please help me think clearly.