Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Help...having an office affair

46 replies

hg4748 · 02/02/2017 11:04

I have recently got extremely close with someone I work with, I love my partner and wouldn't want to cheat on him.

My colleague is being extremely forward and I am more and more intrigued?

Has anyone been in this position, did you go forward/ tell your other half or regret it?

Thanks

OP posts:
Goingtobeawesome · 02/02/2017 12:53

How about you tell us which office you work in and we can see if it's someone's partner on here you're intrigued by Hmm.

Nothing wrong with thinking someone is good looking. Everything wrong with cheating.

Bct23 · 02/02/2017 12:56

Loads of people have. It's the most common palace to cheat. I have been tempted 3 times in 30 years but managed to say no. I can see where the feeling comes from though. It was very powerful attraction on all three occasions.

Blobby10 · 02/02/2017 12:58

Its an ego-boost. Re-evaluate what you have, if its enough then you shouldn't be even considering an affair however intriguing it is. If its not enough work out why - if its possible work on it WITH your partner. If its not then end the relationship and THEN get involved with your colleague. Of course, by then your colleague may well have lost interest as he/she is only interested in someone who is attached as thats the thrill.

TheNaze73 · 02/02/2017 14:31

Just think of the consequences before you do. Lust & love are very different. The reality of things may not be as rosy as you'd think. For every happy ending with OM/OW, I'm sure there's an equal amount that go tits up. If you're going to do it though, do the right thing by your current partner. If you were truly happy though, it'd never have got to this stage.

SeasideRock · 02/02/2017 19:07

I have just ended an affair with a married man - I'm single. Thankfully his wife didn't find out. Despite being the one to end it I feel pretty wretched. I also can't really tell the people closest to me why I'm so sad and wobbly at the moment as they would be pretty unimpressed by my behavior.
It started as a bit of intrigue, and then feelings started to develop. It's really not worth it and if I could turn the clock back six months I honestly wouldn't go there again. Too painful. The only thing that I am clinging to at present is that I (eventually) did the right thing and broke it off. Just my two pennorth...,

user87654321 · 02/02/2017 22:46

Yep, go for it..What could possibly go wrong?!

Dontsayyouloveme · 02/02/2017 23:55

Cannot believe the questions you've asked in your post OP! Incredulous! You don't deserve your partner even at this point in time.

AutumnRose1988 · 03/02/2017 00:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HelenaGWells · 03/02/2017 00:36

I love my partner and wouldn't want to cheat on him.

Then don't. Explicitly tell the colleague you are attached and not interested. Keep all contact to work related only. Don't put yourself in a situation where something
could happen.

Thinkingofausername1 · 03/02/2017 15:09

Report colleague to hr. it sounds to me that you like the attention but you are now starting to find him overwhelming. Don't let some sleezy guy at work, ruin your life.

noego · 03/02/2017 16:05

Personally seen this loads of times. It always ends in tears. And those tears will be yours. Its a no win situation.

Phoebefromfriends · 03/02/2017 18:53

Your "intrigue" might lead to syphilis and a broken home. Does no one ever think of STI's when contemplating cheating?

Seriously though I would seek out counselling to work out what is going on with your marriage and either fix it or break up before exchanging bodily fluids with the office crush

AutumnRose1988 · 05/02/2017 10:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Phoebefromfriends · 05/02/2017 10:39

Yep according to the latest statistics its on the rise plus it was the only one I knew I could spell

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/society/2016/jul/05/syphilis-cases-england-rise-by-76-per-cent-four-years

Agatha44 · 05/02/2017 12:53

This happened to me, but I was the one who had to deal with the fall out. My ex (of 15 years) slept with a co-worker last year and now they are having a baby together. They still work together, are living together etc. I also work at the same company. Great!
In my opinion I would shut it right down. It might work out for some people and brilliant if it does but imagine what happens if it doesn't work out. It would be a complete shitstorm at work and one of you would probably have to leave.
I am still dealing with the fall out and it is horrible. It isn't just you and the other man, think about everybody else who will be affected. Don't be selfish just for a brief moment of excitement.

AutumnRose1988 · 06/02/2017 06:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DrScholl · 06/02/2017 07:03

She hadn't slept with him. Or got syphillis !!

AutumnRose1988 · 08/02/2017 11:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jbee1979 · 08/02/2017 20:30

It's interesting that the title suggests you're HAVING an affair, but the text asks us how we feel about your prospective affair. What Kr1stina said though... That's the best answer.

AutumnRose1988 · 09/02/2017 14:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AutumnRose1988 · 09/02/2017 14:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page