Does he like me less coz i breast feed??

[NessMelCads]

My 2nd dd is now 8 mnths old, dh adores dd 1 who is 26 mnths but has very little bond withh dd 2. He cannot cope with her crying and irritability. We havent been getting on at all and i feel that he doesnt realize how hard it is with 2 he gives me no credit. we dont talk and if we are talking its arguing and he has said some hatful things to me lately. Today i noticed when i was bfing my dd that he was eviling dd 2 do you think or have you heard of any one getting jealous of the whole bfing thing? Why would he be and am i just making excuses coz he actually just hates me and doesnt need a reason?? Very confused and unloved.

I think you sound a bit hormonal and are having difficulties with your husband and looking for reasons. Talk to him. Stay calm.

Maybe think ive just started my monthly for the first time since having dd2. Bit worried my marriage is heading for breakup.

Talk to him!!

having an unsettled baby is incredibly stressful for the whole family - it sounds like you're both taking things out on each other really, and you sound exhausted. is there anyone who can look after dd2 for even a couple of hours every now and then to give you a break?

Tried that hes not the talking too type, he says im evil and vindictive?? and push him to say horrid things. Maybe i do resent him for not loving his little girl

I wish there was i come from a very anti bfing family and they seem to give her a wide birth and say 'oh she only likes to be with mummy coz weve never been able to feed her.

oh god, the "I'm a bastard because you made me one" line. there is no answer to it really, other than to ignore it. have you tried expressing?

she wont take a bottle, well i havent tried hard enough seems like hard work and they say dh should do it as if i try to give a bottle shell just want me boobs

The MW asked me if my DH minded me breast feeding. She said that in her experience quite a number of men disliked their babies being bf. Your DH might be jealous... Mine was a bit weird about it but he felt left out and a bit useless. Of course, he didn't tell me this at the time. A year later he mentioned it!

I think I'd do it differently the next time and ask DH to do more of the cuddling after feeding, bathtime, etc. We'll see. It is such a stressful time. Pretty hard on both of you. Perhaps talk to him and try to be direct when everything is calm and ok and see what he says?

Hope everything turns out ok.

DH has always done her bath and get her ready for bed as thats when hes home and i am very thankful of that, but i literally sit downstairs praying she wont play up (like she does every night) so he can enjoy being with her. DD1 always slept through but dd2 is always up and that bugs hime the most. he gets so cross that she keeps him awake