I want out but I'm scared.

[theautismdisciple]

Just that really. I needed somewhere safe to write that down.

Just come home from work to a trashed house (kids toys etc dishes clothes muddy shoes) again.

Kids ignored all day in favour of games and I've just been screened at to get out of he livnibg room cos my noise, i.e. Cleaning the shit up is interrupting his gaming.

Asked please don't talk to me like that you aren't my dad. Got shoved out the room and door slammed in my face.

What have I done wrong?

I can't leave my son won't come with me, am trapped with nowhere to go.

Hi OP, this sounds horrible

I work for a Housing Association. If your partner is abusing you - and from what you've said he most definitely IS - you need to speak to your housing officer asap as they'll be able to help you. Housing Officers are trained in safe guarding and know how to spot the signs of physical and emotional abuse and what they can do about you. They'll work with partnership agencies - DA support groups, etc and get you all the help you need. You don't need to live like this x

If you work can arrange things there without him being aware? Contact dv hot line or seek some advice.

Hi.i had 3 children, no job. Abusive controlling husband. It took 3 years but eventually one day the words " I don't love you anymore " just came out!!! Subconsciously I had come to the end. He left that day! However it wasn't that easy. He kicked me and my children out (aged 1, 3 and 6) he bullied me into signing everything over. I slept on the floor at my parents for two years. I lost everything and gained so much more. He was violent and nasty , then became mentally cruel. My revenge is the fact that I'm happy everyday. I found out about me. Remembered the things that made me happy,. Find the strength from within. You don't need to put up with it!!! Children see, hear, remember. They will be happier if mummy is happy. There is so much help out there. Your happpiness is worth taking a risk. I had everything, beautiful house, car, designer clothes. Then when faced with no money. I put it all on eBay. I have no emotional connection to material things. My heart is a happy one... it took time. Many dark dark days. But I'm a survivor. You deserve to be happy x

Thank you all. Your response is overwhelming. I think it's time to make a plan or at the very least get more info.

Would speaking to my housing officer make anything official. Or alert social services?

He's come upstairs now and is in the bath so prob can't reply for a while.

Massive respect for woman stronger than I.

Good luck, OP.

Speaking to your Housing Officer won't make anything official, unless they're worried your children are at risk of harm. They're they are there to support you and will be guided by what you want to do and will provide you with practical advice and information. They can help you find somewhere safe to live if you want to leave your home, or provide you with extra security measures if he leaves and you want to stay in your home. They can give you advice on getting a restraining order or injunction against him if that's what you want to do, and they can refer you to agencies who can help you... but only if this is what you want.

You sound very scared, but you've made the first step by reaching out on here. There's lots of us on here who've been in the same situation and will be here for you.

Tonight, please look after yourself and stay safe. If he threatens you and if you're frightened don't hesitate to call the Police x